𝐈𝐍𝐅𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐓𝐄, doctor strange.

Fights

ANA'S POV

                     Steven paced in front of me, his eyes filled with worry and amazement smothered together, his cape billowing each time he twisted on his heel. I calmly read the book in front of me, the Great Gatsby, the words flowing off the page and into my brain, a mental picture swirling. I smirked at a sarcastic remark a character made, and Steven skidded to a stop and faced me, me being on the floor cross-legged giving him the extra height. I looked up, giving an amused questioning gaze with a raised eyebrow, and he scoffed in irritation, shaking his head with a frown before retreating around the corner into the kitchen. 

                     I crinkled my brows in confusion, my face contorted, as I slammed my book shut and got to my feet, rounding the corner where Steven was. He had been acting like this for the past three days, ignoring my presence and seeming to be secluded from the world around him. It must have been the picture I drew, I thought, gritting my teeth together. I came around the corner, giving a confused gaze at Steven, who slightly raised his head from the position it was in his hands as he sat at the kitchen table. I gave an encouraging smile, and he only scowled before returning his head to his hands, sighing with irritation.

                 " Steven, what is your problem?" I said expectantly, standing in front of him with my arms crossed across my chest. He inhaled sharply and looked up, and I could see the rage boiling in his blue eyes. And it scared me. " Everything is the problem, Ana," he whispered, his voice dripping venom as he shook his head, swallowing. I shifted uncomfortably from foot to foot, wincing at his forlorn expression. I sucked in a breath of air, huffing it out in front of me as I watched Steven run a hand through his hair, his hands trembling. " You know, it's going to be fine, Steven," I said quietly, but he jumped from his chair, sending it toppling backwards making me jump in fright. 

                  " NO, NOTHING IS GOING TO BE ALRIGHT!" he roared, his voice booming, as he sent a murderous glare my way, and I tensed my jaw, not liking the way this was going. " How do you not see that? Ever since you got here, everything has been going wrong!" he yelled, gripping his head with his hands as he shook his head, breathing heavily. My adrenaline pumped at his words, and I felt anger boil as I walked up to him, frowning deeply with a snarl. " My fault? How is this my fault, Steven? I didn't want this, I never wanted for my career to be blown to bits, did I?" I yelled at him, venom dripping from my words. His expression remained the same, his hands clenched at his sides. He moved forward, his face only inches from mine, his breath on my face. " What career? You worked at a cafe, and you call that a career? I lost my ability to ever operate again and save lives, and you want to talk about how your job at a small cafe was a career?!" he spat, and my breathing wavered slightly, my gaze locking with his.

                My stomach rolled, and the temper I had fought so hard to keep from exploding, was let out. " It was all I had, Steven! You were able to see your parents, have them smile at you as you took your first steps, or headed to your first day of school, or received your diploma. Your parents got to see you do that, and you actually had an education. I was secretly taught by a bloody nun how to do math and read! I didn't have anyone to love me, but you want to criticize about my choices in life? I had no other choice!" I screamed at him, the rage pouring out of me. Twisting on my heel, I stalked off from him, running up the stairs as tears pooled in my eyes, finally sliding down my cheeks as I slammed my bedroom door shut. Collapsing onto my bed, I sobbed into my pillow, my eyes stinging as Steven's words flowed through my head. The nerve he had to say things like that. 

              Sitting up, inhaling sharply, I gripped my keyboard from the edge of my dresser and clicked it on, preparing my fingers as they gently rifted against the ivory keys, before I began to press the notes, my rage fueling every note, every measure, every melody that ran from the keys and through the speakers. I don't know why 'Hacksaw Ridge' came so naturally, but I continued to play, striking each black and white key in accurate synchronization. My fingers hit a wrong note, and I stepped back, collapsing onto the pillows of the bed. Water pooled in my eyes and obstructed my vision, swirling the colors of the wooden ceilings. My heart ached and my stomach twirled with raw emotion, and my eyes stung harshly. Lifting my head tiredly, only then did I notice the lingering shadow behind the door, before it disappeared and footsteps echoed away before the slamming of Steven's door. 

<>

I'll stand in this rain, with my face to the sky.

Extending my hands to you in a silent cry.

Around every corner, a painful mess.

I am told one day, a testimony for one to bless.

Until then, what am I to do?

Some days I feel, I will not make it through.

Another day filled, with hopelessness and despair.

Barely alive, fighting for air.