Stella Starlet

Shadows

Carter Adam's Point of View

-

I drove like a madman to the hospital. I was almost prepared to hear police sirens chasing me, pursuing me about my erratic speed. 

When I got there and carried her in, I began yelling for help and she was placed on a gurney and rushed away by nurses.

I buried my hands in my hair, tugging at the strands in frustration.

What the hell just happened? Why was she crying, why was she in danger, and why was she having a seizure? 

I took a seat in the waiting room, feeling guilty. I wanted to help her, I wanted to take all of this pain away but I couldn't do anything; just sit here and listen to the faint noise of typing on a computer and shoes clicking on the floor. 

After hours and hours of waiting, a nurse came out and looked at me. 

"Jackie?" I asked, giving her a small smile.

"Oh my God, Carter. Hey." 

Jackie and I used to be in a relationship but it ended in good terms over a year ago. 

I stood up and walked over to her. "Any news?" 

"The patient was having a seizure and then went into respiratory failure about five minutes after you brought her here. She's being treated in the Intense Care Unit, she's in critical condition, Carter."

I put my head in my hands. "Jesus Christ," I swore.

"How? How did this all happen?" I quizzed, concerned. 

She hesitated for a moment but then lowered her voice. "We found cocaine in her system, this was most likely an overdose. And her blood alcohol level was through the roof; it was point-one-six-one. Those two mixed together ultimately should've killed her. She's lucky, but we aren't certain that she'll survive this one. I'm sorry, Carter."

The words reverberated through my mind like a devilish echo. Even though I did not even really know her, her possible death came as a punch in the throat. 

"So she might . . . die?" I asked, choking on those words.

She nodded solemnly and put her hand on my shoulder. "I'm so sorry. But, do you know who her family is? Anyone we can call?"

"I don't know. I don't think so. I don't think she has anyone . . ." I trailed off.

"Go home, Carter. It's one in the morning, I'll call you if anything changes."

I nodded, speechless. I turned around and walked away, stunned at the thought of the girl who had just grabbed me and pulled me into a tight hug just hours ago, could die at any minute. 

When I got in my car, I just sat there. The only sounds were my heavy breathing and cars driving past. 

I felt useless. Useless that I couldn't help. Useless that I couldn't even tell them who her identity was because I didn't even know myself, all I knew was that she was Adaline Lennox from California. 

Christ, there wasn't even a parental contact card for her in the school records or her address.

I finally backed out of the parking lot and drove home. The lights were on in the cozy home and as I locked the car and opened the front door, I could hear sniffling coming from the dining room. 

Shit.

As I walked over, I saw Kaitlin sitting at the table, her eyes red and puffy from tears. 

"Oh thank God!" She ran over and hugged me tightly. "Where the hell have you been?"

"I was at the hospital . . ." Concern washed over her delicate features. "One of my students, they're in critical condition right now."

I saw down in one of the chairs, leaning my head on my hand and looking at the floor. 

"Oh, honey, I'm so sorry." Kaitlin crouched down to look at me in the eyes. "What happened?" 

I hesitated. I didn't want to tell her. It didn't feel right, telling a story that did not belong to me. 

"I don't know," I lied. "All I know is that I found her unconscious in the hotel parking lot and I drove her to the hospital."

Kaitlin pulled me into another hug, one I did not reciprocate. It was the first time her touch felt foreign, like it did not belong on my skin . . . Like I didn't want it there.

"Can we just go to bed now?" I asked, sighing. 

Kaitlin and I had been together for almost a year, and I was undeniably in love with her. Or at least I was up until that night. It was almost like a switch that was inside of me just shut off, cutting out the warm feelings I had towards her. 

It was Adaline. I knew it was Adaline. 

God, I wanted to help her. There was something about the pain in her eyes that made me want to nurture her back to happiness. 

Cocaine and alcohol, quite a mixture for a teenager to be consuming. And enough to the point where she underwent treatment in the ICU was deathly concerning. 

I wondered, were these all vices. Or was it something more than that, something that had veins rooted so deep in her soul that it caused her to be the creator of her own destruction. 

But why? What caused her to be like that; to be so reckless and precarious? 

Maybe it was whatever she was running from. When she had confided to me that someone was indeed out there to harm her, she lit a wick of anger, burning corrosively inside of me. 

I wanted to protect her from whatever wickedness she was trying to vanish from. 

As Kaitlin and I walked up the stairs, she told me about her day, attempting to take my mind off of Adaline.

I didn't listen. Her voice was faded out by my thoughts, their ebb and flow echoing through my mind like waves in a storm; demanding to be heard.

When I laid down, I couldn't bring myself to fall asleep. My mind was too awake, the cogs and gears gyrating at a rapid rate.

Again, hours stacked on top of each other until the sunlight coruscated through the curtains, signifying a night that I did not sleep. 

When the alarm went off, I did not want to get up and go to work. I did not want to have to pretend that everything was fine. This was probably the way Adaline had felt everyday; pretending that the demons all around her were just shadows. 

On the way to work in my car, I called Jackie. 

"How is she?" That was my first question.

"She is in a medically induced coma. She isn't stable enough to be conscious just yet."

"Do they think she will make it?" I asked, my breathing halted.

"The doctors don't know. Too early to say, but if they know, I'll call you."

"Thank you so much."

With that, our phone conversation ended. 

My hope for Adaline's survival increased just a little bit. Maybe I was being too hopeful, but I had to believe that she would live to see another sunset again.