Realization

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My parents are finally doing what is was hoping but it doesn't feel as good as I thought it would feel. It feels like my heart is splitting in two and I'm sad all the time but I never show it. This girl said something to me and all my tears started flowing out but not because of what she said but because I'd been holding my tears in for long enough and couldn't control it. Soon after I had to hurry and stop cause I didn't want my boyfriend to know. I'm already the reason for all the restrictions we have on our relationship. Don't wanna add onto that with my problems, that aren't important. This divorce between my parents is gonna be the hardest thing for me but I refuse to show my sadness. I'm the oldest, I must stay strong for my parents and my sister. Plus, nothing's gonna change so it's no use in trying to change it. My dad and I have made amends to our relationship but I know when he moves out it'll won't get any better. I'm just ready for all this to be over and I can finally breathe.

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