Never Before-Ryan Reeves Fanfiction

Suspended

Ryan POV
I closed the door on Maria's disappointed and confused face but before it locked she stuck her foot out to stop it.
"Ryan, what is going on?" She asked pushing it open and walked into my room.
"I don't know," I said honestly, "I just can't be with you."
"Why?" She persisted, " I would like to know why you want to be with me, but can't."
"Well.."I struggled, "You know, it doesn't fit my image does it? Sentimentality and all that. I can't afford to have feelings like this, it gets in the way of..other..important stuff..."
All the stuff I'd been hiding for the past few months was suddenly spilling out. I expected her to be annoyed but she was listening intensely with those big eyes of hers.
Eventually she interrupted me, "Ryan look, you're a challenge ok?" She said, "I know that, you know that, we both know that so there's no point denying that."
I was unable to disagree.
"But don't you see?" She smiled, "I still like you. Cause you're imperfect. It reassures me that no one is, and it gives me a chance to fix you."
I was silent for a minute, thinking. She continued regardless-wow, she really did get me.
"Look Ryan if you want this, then I'm happy to help you." She said, "But you have to be honest. What do you want?"
I blinked-I considered lying to her,
"Don't lie," she warned me before I opened my mouth, "I see it all anyway."
Damn she knew me well.
"I want to be friends." I said finally, "Really and truly I want to be good friends with you."
She blinked, was she hurt? Did I say something wrong?
"Friends? Right, ok," she said lively enough but a little flustered. She smiled, "Sure, that'd be great."
"Just friends?" I asked, waiting for confirmation.
"If you want," she shrugged.
"Umm.." I thought hard, "Yes. Yes for now, just friends."
"Sure," she smiled wanly, "Great..you're definitely not going to ignore me then?"
"Course not," I said hugging her gently. "Good," she mumbled into my chest.

Maria POV

I walked out of Ryan's room as he shut the door and back into mine. I felt slightly deflated. It was good he'd finally admitted what he wanted. It just didn't fit with what I wanted.
Ah well, I smiled to myself as I leant on the window sill, friends was better than nothing.

It was a few days later and we were all eating silently at the table. It was silent because everyone was shocked and miserable. Mike had been suspended just yesterday and none of us knew how to react. I was especially numb. Mike had been my father figure since I'd been tiny. He'd nurtured me, cared for me and taught me so much. I couldn't believe it.
May-Li and Kazima walked in, looking oddly excited.
"Right," said May-Li, "I have a suggestion to cheer you all up. I can't have you lot moping around the house any longer."
"An adventure park!" said Kazima, "It'll be fun,"
May li smiled desperately at our blank faces, "And.." she said taking a compass out of her pocket, "As the only here whose completed a Duke of Edinburgh, Maria you're the navigator."
She handed me the compass while I smiled wanly. Great.
She ushered us into the van and as I stepped in, Ryan came up to May Li.
"Harry's ill," he announced, "He'd rather stay here."
"Oh no," I said stepping off, "Is he ok?"
"Not sure," he replied, "I'll stay with him."
"Oh i can do it too," I said closing the van door. I'd always been fond of Harry.
"No, i can." said Carmen who was next to me.
"You don't have a medical qualification though do you?" I snapped, "And they need a medically trained supervisor present."
"That's true." said May-Li, "But you're also too young and Carmen's old enough so you'll all have to stay."
We all exchanged looks, clearly unhappy with the arrangement.
"I'll ring Shona," said May li, "She'll be here in an hour or two. Ring if there's a problem."
She drove off leaving us standing on the kerb.
"Right well I'm going to see if Harry's ok," Carmen announced, "You two..do what you like."
She flounced off into the house and I looked at Ryan who gave me his classic grin.
"Come on then," he said and I followed him into the house and we went upstairs to find Carmen.
"Oh wait," he said pausing, "Let me get the football."
He opened the door to his room and gestured me to follow him so I helped look in all the predictable places.
I leant down to look under the bed when I felt a pair of arms around my shoulders.
"We got two hours to ourselves Maria," he murmured into my neck.
"Hey," I laughed a little, "What happened to friends?"
"Forgot," he mumbled and I laughed again and playfully pushed him off me, "Let's find this football."
I opened up his wardrobe but instead of a football rolling out, something else tumbled and landed at my knees as something that was unmistakable Mike's missing bag with Carmen's file in it.
"Ryan..." my voice shook slightly, "Why..is this..what?"
I turned round and he looked at me his eyes filled with guilt,
"Is this Mike's bag?" I asked and without looking me in the eye he nodded.
"Ryan why?" I asked exasperated, "Why? You were just starting to fit in! No one is ever going to forgive you if they ever find out about this!"
"Well they won't," he said his voice steady, "If you don't tell them."
"Ryan..I," I wavered-I'd never been in such a situation before.
"Please Maria," he begged taking my hand, "I know it was wrong and I'll sort it out somehow, but you're right. No one will ever forgive me so I need to you to keep it quiet."
"I don't know if I can." I answered, "You know I can't keep guilt inside."
"You're too nice Maria," he smiled slightly, "Just a tad."
"Is that such a bad thing?" I asked and he shook his head,
"Of course not," he said, "It's quite an admirable thing."
I felt the file hot in my hands. This was the one thing that could Mike back. And the one thing that could get Ryan sent away from me forever. I dropped the file with shaking hands back into the wardrobe.
"Thanks Maria," he said his voice wavering slightly, "I promise I'll fix it somehow."
"Yeah you'd better," I said sternly turning round to face him.
"Thank you so much," he said hugging me, "You're a pal."
"See this is what I was afraid of,"  came a voice at the door and Carmen was stood there shaking her head, smiling, "You two getting it on all day while I've got to nurse Harry."
"It's not what it looks like." I said pulling away from Ryan as quickly as I could.
"Yeah yeah," she said rolling her eyes, "Come on Maria I need a hand."
I snapped into action, following her straight out the door and downstairs to the kitchen.
"How did you know?" I asked her as she poured milk into a shaker.
"Duh," she smiled, "You two were always slightly too close."
"Since when?" I asked surprised.
"Like forever," she said, "I sensed something between you since he first arrived."
"Oh." I didn't know what else to say so wiped down the table awkwardly. I looked up to see her smiling at me, "What?"
"Don't worry it's cool," she said, "I just never would have predicted you liked someone like him."
"Just for the record," I said, "We're not going out."
"Well whatever you call it," she laughed, "I'd keep it a secret but I'm pretty sure everyone knows."
"Everyone?"
"Well not everyone," she admitted, "All the older kids."
"Oh like Bailey?" I said in a slightly mocking tone.
"Well..yes I suppose," she said uncomfortably, "Bailey knows."
She looked up at me smiling down at her, "What?"
"Nothing," I smiled raising my eyebrows.
"I don't fancy Bailey!" she said defensively chopping up bananas.
"You said it, not me!" I laughed at her embarrassed expression, "Come on Carms, it's fine."
"Well...whatever," she said throwing the bananas in a blender, "Are you going to help me make Harry a milkshake?"
"Harry doesn't like banana milkshakes," came Ryan's voice who'd entered the room, "I'll look after him."
"We all volunteered," I said, "So we all have to look after him."

After an eventful day of tracking Harry down to Mike's house, the rest arrived home from their eventful day too.
Everyone sat even more miserably in their seats as Mike's hearing was the next day. Ryan seemed quieter and more deflated as we'd both seen the effect Mike's resignation had had on Harry.
He wasn't eating just like the rest of the table and eventually stormed off to his room. Ryan followed him and I followed him. I watched as Harry went to his room and Ryan say deflated on the stairs. He saw me and I saw in his eyes that he'd realised exactly what he'd done.
"What have I done Maria?" He murmured rubbing his hand through his hair, "Harry's so upset."
"You know why though?" I confirmed leaning on the banister and he nodded, "I need to put this right," he said looking at me, "If I put it right, will you forgive me for being such an idiot?"
I tried to smile, "Course,"
We turned around to see May-Li on the phone talking to Mike.
"There you go," I said to him, "You've got till two."
I walked past him and into my room, leaving him to presumably contemplate how to put it right.

I sat at my desk gently sketching a portrait of Mike but it was hard as my hand was shaking because of the guilt in the pit of my stomach. I knew exactly  why Mike was suspended but had no idea how I could put it right. I desperately hoped Ryan realised what'd he'd done.
A heard a shout from downstairs and slid out of my chair and came down to find everyone crowded in the kitchen.
"I've got an idea," announced Ryan, "Mike was at burnout, let's find the documents to prove it."
He led us to the office where everyone desperately began scrambling through all the desks and overturning the chairs and files. I was unsure as to what Ryan's plan was the documents were unlikely to change anyone's mind.
"What's going on?" May-Li bursts in but was interrupted by a shout from the recycling bin.
"May-Li looks!" Carmen flicked through it, "It's all here, definitely , all of it!"
We all stared at her, I let a smile appear on my face, Ryan had well and truly done it-I knew exactly where he was going with this. "We need to go!" shouted May-Li ushering everyone out to the minibus. She stormed out with everyone stampeding behind her, while Ryan held the door open as everyone ran out. I was the last one out and he smirked at me as I walked over slowly but I threw my arms around him when I reached him.
"Woah," he seemed surprised,
"You genius!" I said kissing his cheek, "Come on there's not much time!" I ran off but he grabbed my arm,
"Hang on," he said and I turned round, "There's always time."
"For what?" I asked him and he smiled down at me.
"This," he said kissing me gently on the mouth, "Sorry," he said pulling away, "Couldn't resist."