Finding Us

Chapter Five

There was no way. There was no possible way that he was here. He was the journalist major Gretchen had told her about? Lacey leaned against the back of the closed door, afraid to move from where she was. Gretchen had continued moving him on for the tour, but not before glaring into the depths of her soul. Yeah, she would pay for that later. It wasn't her fault, though. The girls had told her that there was paperwork she needed to get from the foyer. Now, she boiled with anger at the thought of them. They hadn't liked her from the start because she was different from them. What was she going to do?

Suddenly, she felt a hard pound on the door that knocked her forward and in marched Gretchen. Chris must be meeting the other girls now.

"What are you doing in here? You know the rules Lacey!" Gretchen fumed and amidst the heat of the moment, Lacey held back a laugh.

"I was just-"

"Pssst, I don't want to hear it. Disrespect of this kind will not be tolerated. For the next week you will have to clock in more volunteer hours."

"Wait, does that mean?-"

"Yes, it means you will have to work more closely with our journalist major, so don't embarrass us!" Gretchen stormed out dramatically, slamming the door behind her.

Lacey leaned up against the desk and frowned. There was no way she was working with him. She instantly regretted the fact that she had joined this stupid sorority. This wasn't who she was. She didn't wear dresses all the time and she didn't smile at everyone and everything and she definitely didn't have a squeaky little laugh. She needed the money, that's what it came down to. The scholarship this sorority offered was more than she could expect for the money she needed for the rest of her tuition. She wasn't going to ask Maia for help, she had done enough already. She couldn't go to her mother. Lacey sighed. The thought of her mother sent a shooting pain into her gut.

She no longer recognized her mother anymore. The one who chased her around the yard with her tickle hands when she was 5, the one who tucked her in at night with warm kisses when she was 8, the one who gave the best hugs when she'd at the worst day. That mom was gone and she didn't know if she'd ever come back. And it was all her step dads fault. 12 years of abuse and the nightmares still haunt her. She shook it off, though, she needed to get back outside to the rest of the group for intros. She pulled a lock of her chestnut brown hair from face and closed the door behind her.

She was sure to stand out because where all the girl had platinum blonde hair, she had fading brown. Where all the girls looked like plastic model dolls, she looked plain. She was surprised they'd even let her in, but either way she didn't question it too much. She didn't want to stand out, though, so when she got into the living room where the rest of the group was meeting Chris, she slid in towards the back. She would catch him looking at he every so often out of the corner of his eye. She looked away. He already knew who she was, so there was no need for introductions. As Chris made his way toward the back, she searched for Gretchen and kept sliding out of the way until she was almost out of the room.

He must have read her vibe because he stayed away. She kept her distance all day, glancing at him every so often as to keep track of what he was doing. College was turning out to be the experience she never wanted. Maybe she should have stayed home and just watched over her mother. At this point, anything sounded better than where she was now.

She was staying against the far wall of the living room as Gretchen went into a speech about the history of the Deca Chi, when her phone lit up. The text message read that it was from Maia. She smiled for a split second before an ache filled her heart. Maia had gone on and on about how great college was going to be. Maia loved it, so what was she going to say now. She ignored the message and turned off her phone, slipping it back into her pocket. She drifted through the rest of the day, almost without thinking until night fell. It was time for Chris to leave. She felt instantly relieved. The girls dispersed to their rooms, they all had to be up early the next day and she began to do the same. She had just reached the steps when she felt a hand on her arm. Was Gretchen going to lash out at her again? Turning around with a smug look on her face, she saw him and instantly she felt the heat in her cheeks. Why did he have that power over her? She hated it. He gently led her to the closet under the stairs so they could have some privacy.