It Doesn't Matter, You Still Left

Chapter 15

I looked down at my phones lock screen, five missed texts from a blocked number and ten texts from the same one. I shut my phone off and put it down on the table. I leaned my head on the back of the couch sighing loudly.

All of One Direction has been blowing up my phone all day, I thought about chucking it out a window a few times today but stopped myself. If Niall wants to see me he can come to my house, I'm not saying I won't slam the door in his face or kick him in the balls again but hey, he could try.

I sat up again, still leaning my back up against the couch and looked at my phone buzzing on the table. A blocked number didn't pop up this time...it was Niall. His picture was of him from a long time ago, I just never felt the need to change it or even bother with his contact.

I leaned forward and hesitated then grabbed the phone and pressed answer.

"H-hello?" I stuttered trying to focus myself

"She answered." I heard Niall muffled voice on the end and a few 'finalliy' s and 'ok' s.

"Niall?" I asked, trying to sound annoyed even though I wasn't. Well at least not as much as I wanted to be

"Hi Martha." I croaked "Um. Well."

"We don't have all day." I heard Louis' voice through the phone, it wasn't as clear as Niall's so he must've been in the same room, at least I wasn't on speaker.

"Shut it." Liam's voice rang through the phone just as muffled as Louis'

"Martha, can I come over?" Niall talked quickly, almost to fast for me to catch the words tumbling through the speaker of my phone

"You stayed in London?" I asked, confused

"Ya, we found a hotel right outside of London to stay in for a couple nights after I saw you." He sighed

"I-I guess." I bit my nail answering his previous question "Is it just you coming?"

"Ya it is, I'll be over soon. I have to go." I could tell he was smiling, but he was definitely nervous.

"Ok. Bye.' I hung up the phone not waititng to hear him reply and I dropped it onto the couch but it landed on the floor

Yay, Niall is coming over. I sighed and threw my head back once again.

Only two days ago I'd met up with Niall at the airport. I felt slightly bad for what I did but at the same time I was happy about it. I mean, I didn't let him finish what he wanted to tell me and when I let him talk I was to aggravated to even pay any attention so that didn't even matter.

I took a deep breath trying to relax my nerves. my stomach began to cramp up and I started to get a headache just thinking about Niall coming over here. It was probably a good thing I was having Niall come over, I mean we both have things we need to say to each other and we both need to listen to one another. Another good thing is that Paisley isn't here because Ella's boyfriends younger sister is a little older then her and they took them for a play date to the park.

I sighed then got up to put the kettle on the stove and make some tea. I turned on the stove and went back into the living room to wait for the kettle to whistle. Before I heard a whistle I heard a doorbell though. I jumped at the noise and slowly got up walking towards the door.

I took a deep breath gripping the gold metal door knob... I could see the top of Niall's head through the small window par of the door.

I opened the door slowly revealing Niall, his eyes had bags underneath them and he was so pale, his hair laid flat on his head like he hadn't touched it in a few days. He smiled lazily at me, his eyes showed a nervous expression but his smile told me something different.

"Hi." I mumbled stepping to the side to let him in

I looked outside behind him to see if his car was in my driveway or the front of my house but it was no where to be seen. I closed the door hesitantly then turned around. Niall was sitting on the love seat in the living room, his grey sweats and blue t-shirt loose on him.

He looked so cuddly I just...I stopped myself then stepped closer to the living room but still in the hallway .

"Want some tea?" I offered quietly

"Sure." He mumbled staring at the black TV screen in front of him. I nodded and sped to the kitchen.

I grabbed two tea cups and poured the water in them and bags of tea.

I walked back into the living room handing Niall his.

"Thanks." He gave me a half smile then sat up taking a sip

I sat down on the other couch, going to the end closest to Niall's couch.

"So..." I trailed off placing my cup on the table "You wanted to talk?"

He cleared his throat and did the same with his cup then looked at me, "Yes, I did."

"I'm sorry Martha. I should've saw where you were coming from when you didn't tell me. You didn't do it for yourself, you did it for me." He stopped and looked down at his hands that he was leaning over his lap. "I shouldn't of walked out without letting you finish explaining yourself. I know I wish you would've told me because then I would've got the chance of being her life right from the start, but you didn't tell me because you wanted me to be happy." He looked back up at me then leaned his back up against the couch not giving up on my stare

"I wanted to tell you Niall, and I know I should've told you. Oh trust me I know because eit haunts me everyday." I spoke on the verge of tears but held them back

"I know I left and didn't say good bye, and I was gone for a year and a half but it wasn't my choice to leave you don't even know how tough management is. The only reason we're at a hotel is because the lads know how much you mean to me and they're risking their jobs to help me." He looked down and tried to wipe the tears that away that ran down his face before I saw it but didn't catch it in time and seeing him cry made me cry.

Tears silently fell down my cheeks, I stood up and walkd over to Niall sitting next to him. He looked up at me shame taking over his face, wither it was because he was crying or all the other reasons I couldn't tell but I didn't even care. I smiled at him warmly and he sat up straighter his eyes sparkling.

"How about we forget about management for a bit and start over. He looked shock but then a wide smile took over his face when I leaned in and placed a big kiss on his lips. I moved my face away enough that are noses were touching and we were looking in each others eyes.

"Ok." He nodded then wrapped his arms around me kissing me as patiently as ever....

"I love you." He mumbled against me lips

I broke the kiss and smiled at his then laid my head on his shoulder snuggling against him "I loved you too."