One And Done: Spoby One Shots

Author's Note

I don't mean to be ungrateful to my readers (I am very grateful) but I just feel like nothing is ever enough or right. I either don't update the "right" fic or I get "update please" right after posting a chapter. When I post a chapter I want quality feedback. I want a reaction to the story or chapter, especially with my fanfiction.

When I started writing fanfiction, I wasn't going to post it anywhere. I just started writing out these story ideas so I could clear my head so that I could write Pretty Little Liar theories. After I started writing and the story ideas kept on coming that's when I decided that I would post on ff.net and see if people liked my stories. And you did like them so I kept writing them.

I spent soooo much time writing. Hours every day typing away. Sometimes I got so carried away with writing that I was neglecting myself. I'm not blaming you guys or anything, I just want you to realize everything that goes and has gone into these stories. I put my heart and soul into my stories.

At some point I had the thought "I wish I could get paid to do this". An eventually I thought I would try and write an original story. Maybe I could have a published book! I have always wanted to write a book, pretty much since I learned how to write (My first memory was when I was 5). Hell, I was writing fricken "Dawson's Creek" fanfiction before I knew what fanfiction was.

I'm a writer. That's what I do. That's all I want to do.

When I first started posting stories, you guys loved it and I loved all of you. I loved having a platform and a creative outlet. You were all so jazzed. It was art in a way.

It hasn't all been roses and sunshine. I've had hurtful and mean spirited comments. I've had people steal my work. I've had certain things get me down so much that I stopped writing. But I persevered, because I love my art.

But something happened. I don't know how, I don't know when, and I don't know why. Some of you stopped reading or at least stopped commenting. I don't know what I did, maybe I didn't do anything, I don't know. I'll probably never know. That was discouraging when not as many people were commenting and I pandered to you guys a little bit. I wanted to make my readers happy. I wanted to give you guys what you wanted.

When I started writing my original story, I thought you guys would read it. I thought you would like it but (with the exception of a handful of people) you never even gave it a chance.

I have no words to convey to you guys how unbelievably abandoned, heartbroken, deceived, and lied to I felt when you didn't read it. But still I persevered yet again and kept writing it. (While still periodically posting new fanfiction I might add.)

I had to work for reads for my story because I believed in it and I know this is only the beginning of the struggle, hurt, and rejection that I will have to endure in the process of getting my book published but someday I will get there. You all will be able to see my book on a bookshelf in a bookstore.

I have had people ask me if I'm sick of writing or sick of writing spoby fanfiction. I'm not. I love writing and I love writing spoby. I didn't lose the desire to write, I lost my readers.

It's been great writing fanfiction and I'm going to continue the stories that I have started because I owe it to the stories, if that makes sense.