Texts to My Abuser

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1.
"I'm broken and broken people aren't beautiful, the poems aren't true. Broken people are ugly and they don't know how to trust or love or make the pain go away."

2.
"I am a living contradiction because I always save people and I wish that someone would do the same, would fight for me and help me. But the second someone tries to I push it away because I don't deserve them. I isolate myself then wonder why I'm lonely. And I don't want to tell anyone I'm hurting but then I hate that nobody notices."

3.
"I'm sorry I gave you everything without asking if you wanted it first."

4.
"For someone with such a big heart, there's strangely not enough room for me to love myself."

5.
"One minute I'm saying I want to be alone and then the next I'm hugging you in the street like some pathetic loser. I hate everything but you and why is that? Why can't I hate you? Because it would be a hell of a lot easier but I could never, ever hate you."

6.
"I understand if you don't love me. I don't love me either."

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