The Pretty Boy's Crush

Lunch Without Him

For lunch, I got fruit and water. That's it. That's all I am allowing myself to eat. If I eat anything else, it could make me gain lots of carbs. Too many carbs to be pretty enough to be Jason's crush or girlfriend. I need to lose weight.

"Hey, Paige. Are you okay?" Margo asks me as I shrug not knowing if I should say yes or no, it'll probably be easier to say yes than no. It always is honestly, I've been diagnosed with Depression with years, but it's been getting better, until now, now it's acting up like it's something worse than a mental disorder, it's acting like a plague, something that's taking me over.

"I uh, guess," I say as she looks to me and then what I'm eating.

"Are you sure? You aren't eating anything but fruit and water. That's not like you. Are you sure you're okay? If you're not, you can always tell me." She says trying to make me feel better.

"I'm just not that hungry." I lie as my stomach hurts as it wants food. I take a bit of the carrot, and my stomach then growls begging for food.

"Are you still upset about what happened yesterday?" Margo asks me as she takes a bite out of her chips. Chips look so good right now. I want to ask for one, but there are too many carbs. Too many. I have to lose weight. I have to lose it fast.

"Hey, Paige," I hear a familiar voice say. It is Jason. I turn around and look at him.

"Oh, hey," I murmur thinking about how fat and ugly I look.

"About yesterday, I'm so sorry. Makenna didn't mean anything that she said. If you ask her, she never said any of it," Jason explains as I'm now craving a kiss from him. For his apology to be a sweet and gushy kiss.

"Okay, I've been thinking about a diet anyway. She just finally pushed me into actually doing it. So, you can tell her that I said thanks." I say smirking as my stomach growls. I take another bite of a carrot and then end up eating all of it.

"Oh, okay. Personally- "

"Look, Jason, Paige doesn't want to talk to you." Margo cut him off with her stern and cutting sentence.

Jason makes a distraught and hurt face as he sighs. "Yeah... I should've guessed that..." He says upset as he starts to rub the back of his neck.

"Jason, I think that you're adorable and cute. I've always wanted you to notice me and ask me out, but you never do so, I don't know what else to do to show you that I'm in love with you!" I say getting up leaving my tray and everything there as I storm to the girls' bathroom and go into a stall and start crying. I bet that Jason is standing there miffed. Like I just blew him away. I bet that he's giving that dumb, adorable look to Margo, asking her why she didn't tell him that I wanted him to be mine all along.

Of course, this is all my fault, I was the one who wanted to get into this whole boy drama. If I just would've stayed at my old seat, I wouldn't of fell in love with him. I wouldn't feel the urge to caress his face and tell him that he's cute and that he needs to be mine and that I love him. If I could've just stayed away from him and didn't look into those dark green eyes and feel safe.

...

The end of lunch came way too fast. The next thing I know I hear someone open up the door and tell all the girls to go out of the bathroom. It is an administrator of course.

"Can I stay in here?" I whisper to myself as I leave the stall and see that it's Mrs. Cooper. She is one of our Vice Principles. She looks me up and down. She has dark skin that looks like Hershey's chocolate. She's wearing little glasses that let her brown eyes look me up and down. Her black hair looks freshly done as it is perfectly straight.

"I'm sorry I was in here so long I- "

"What is wrong honey?" She asks me in a smooth and soothing tone. A tone that a mother would use to a toddler who just woke up from a terrifying nightmare. "Are you okay?" She asks putting her hand on my shoulder. Her hand is hot and soothing to the touch. Something that should remind me of my mother, but it doesn't because she's never done that to me, she just tells me that I'm being overdramatic, and I need to shut up.

"My heart is just broken, I'll be fine, it'll repair itself, right?" I ask her as she smiles and nods.

"Of course, it will honey. It always does and it always will." She says giving me a warm and fully hearted smile. "Now, you want to talk about it?" She asks me as I slowly nod.

"Alright, come with me to my office. You can talk about it there. Your name is Paige Newsworth, right?" She asks me as I nod.

"Yes, ma'am." She smiles liking my respect.