Before She Falls

Chapter 38

Two days later I'm sitting in a cafe with Liam and Drew for lunch. It's a small place about five minutes away from Liam's house. I've only been here about three or four times, but I remember always walking past here when I would walk to secondary school ages ago.

"So are you planning on visiting Harry or not?" Liam asks as he takes a huge bite into his sandwich.

"Yeah, tonight" I tell him, wiping my mouth with a paper napkin.

"You're seeing Harry tonight?" Drew asks me.

"Yeah.."

"Why?" His eyes squint. "Are you guys like together?"

"Uh, I don't know" I answer and I don't really know at this point. Harry has been texting me since he left for Cheshire, but not once have we defined the relationship between the two of us.

"How is that even supposed to work out?" Drew questions and his face is still scrunched into a confused look.

"What do you mean?" I ask him right back.

"How are you supposed to be with him or whatever when he's going to be traveling all over the world for months?" Drew is being so serious, more serious than usual. "And then you're going back to BU in two weeks and the internship...Don't you think it's going to be hard to keep in touch, let alone be in a relationship?

I pause because I have no idea how to respond; everything my brother just said makes me come to the realization that maybe this situation with Harry should have never happened. Drew's right; there's no way I can stay connected to someone who's flying to a different country every day performing every night. And then there's me who has a paid-internship that I worked my fucking ass off to get and I'll be surprised if I have time to eat and sleep between Modest and running to my classes once a week.

Liam leans back in his chair, preparing to hear my response.

"I don't know, Drew" I twirl my straw in circular motions around the rim of my cup. "I just like him a lot and I haven't really thought about any of that. I guess I just figured it would all work itself out somehow."

"I don't think it'll be as hard as it seems" Liam chimes in and Drew and I both direct our attention towards him. "You guys have to be serious though, properly committed, for it to work."

"Is Harry really a commitment guy?" Drew asks in such a brotherly way that I'm not sure if I find it endearing or annoying.

"Not always I'll admit. But when he finds someone he really likes, he's loyal. And I believe that's the case with Kat" Liam smiles. "I mean just take a look at Zayn and Perrie, Louis and El, even Danielle and I. It's possible to have a relationship with a band member, but it's difficult. But, Perrie's off doing just about the same thing as us and Zayn still finds a chance to talk to her while they're away from each other. He flies her out sometimes when he knows he'll have enough time to hang out with her. And Lou calls Eleanor every night before he goes to bed while he's on tour, even though she's busy with school work for university, they always find time."

"They've also all been together for so long" Drew adds in.

"Well even when I was on tour and Danielle and I were together. She'd fly out and surprise me; she'd only tell Louis or Niall when she was coming and seeing her always helped me stay sane. Flying around and performing takes a lot out of us, so having someone there to talk to us whenever we have free time is so extremely refreshing. And Harry and Niall didn't have any of that for the last tour. So when I say the two of them 'have their fun from time to time', I'm not talking about anything mental but they both need attention in that way to stay sane, just like the rest of us."