Royal Love

Chapter 34

(Henry's POV)

   I wasn't sure I heard her right. "No?"

   She sighed and turned away but I could see the tears that had started to fall. "No. I can't marry you."

   I stood up. "Can't?"

   "Fine I won't!"

   She couldn't really be doing this. "Why not? Sarah after all that we have been through we owe it to ourselves to be happy. To be together."

   She turned around so fast that I had to take a step back. She had tears streaming down her face. "Do we really? After what we have been through, what I have been through, I don't think I owe myself anything. Everyone is right I am useless and pathetic! I can't protect myself or a child! Henry I can't possibly keep living when I know that I will be in everyone's way. I could be the cause of someone's death! You said you were ready to die for me!"

   "Sarah! Listen to yourself. This isn't you. You are not useless or pathetic, but at the moment you are making yourself be useless and pathetic. If this keeps you down then you are not the person I thought you were. I would give up my life for that person." I knew the words would hurt, and her face proved that, but they had to be said. She had to see how ridiculous she was being.

   "If that is what you think of me then why are you here? I told you, you could go, so why are you here?"

   "I told you. I would never leave you." She was being so difficult!

   "Sure, but do you mean it? You left me before, twice."

   "You know why I had to."

   "Then why didn't you take me with you? You say you had to, okay then why did you leave me behind? If you couldn't take me with you when you had to leave then how am I so sure that you would stay with me?" She shot back.

   "You had your sisters! Sarah, I love you! I would have took you with me but I know how much you love your sisters!"

   She stayed silent for a moment then opened her mouth but closed it again. I was aware of everyone staring at us. Finally she spoke. "You once told me that you didn't love me, a...and to be honest I don't love you." She whispered the words but they cut deep and I was hurt.

   "You don't mean that Sarah."

   I watched as a tear slid down her face. "I do."

   I couldn't hold the rage back any more. "You are lying!," I saw her flinch at the words or maybe at the volume of my voice. "You are lying. After what we have been through, after what I have done for you. For us!" I hissed, "You have almost died more than once! You can not stand there and say you don't love me!"

   She held her chin high. "You were a fling and that was all."

   I walked until I was standing right in front of her. I was aware of how close we were. "You can't honestly think I believe you. Sarah I know you. Why are you saying these things," She opened her mouth but I held my hand up. "Don't tell me because its true."

   "Fine. You want the truth! I do love you."

   "Then why are you doing this? Why not marry me?"

   "I can't love anyone after that. I lost our child! I was stupid for allowing him," From the venom in her voice I could tell that him was Emanuel. "To do that! When ever I see you, Henry, it cause me pain. To think that I disappointed you is to much." She bowed her head.

   I put my hand under her chin and lifted her head so she met my eyes. I wiped her tears away with my thumb. "I would never be disappointed in you. You couldn't do any thing to stop him. We can have another child. Sarah I mean it when I say I love you."