Can You Understand? (1D fanfic)

Chapter 30

I slide out onto the ice and waved out to the audience, who were cheering me on. I forced myself to not look up to find the boys or to find Dallas. I felt too nervous for that.

I skated to the middle of the rink and stood with my arms outstretched. My music began playing. It was a soft piano ballad.

Focus. No fear, stay clear.

I began my routine by doing a backwards figure eight. I slowly breathed in and slowed down my pace. Don't rush.

I began to prep for my twizzle. I very much disliked this move. I flung myself into the air and landed flawlessly. My blade hit the ground just perfectly.

I still felt very nervous. I couldn't overcome the nervousness.

Just don't let it become fear. I told myself. Be free.

So I skated my heart out. I skated for those who left me, I skated for those who were still with me. I skated for those who wanted to see me succeed.

I put my heart and soul into my jumps and spins. The crowd went crazy. My nerves were calming. I felt the wind of my speed against my bare arms and shoulders. It felt calming.

My thoughts subsided, and I was in a complete transe. I glanced up at the crowd. That was the worst decision I could ever make.

I immediately saw Dallas's innocent smile. I don't know how I found him. It was then, I realized, I loved him. I looked up at the Box View rooms and saw the boys. I saw Harry pressed up against the glass, looking down and smiling.

I felt a pang of something in my stomach when I saw him. I couldn't really describe it, nor did I know what it meant.

My song drew to a close. I couldn't stop thinking about Dallas and Harry. Heat spread though my arms when I realized that I was going off balance. I almost fell.

Stop. I told myself. No fear. Stay clear.

I couldn't do it. I couldn't balance. I couldn't concentrate. The last thirty seconds of my song played. I was lost in my mind. Something bad was going to happen. I knew it.

I let fear take over my body.

My muscles tensed up, and it became harder to move. My spins became harder to execute.

I neared the final move of the routine. The triple lutz. This move got me, and Dallas, in a whole lot of trouble. This is what I've worked all my life for. This one move could make or break me.

My muscles seemingly got tighter. I began to feel a cramp in my lower left leg.

I strided the last two feet until I propelled myself in the air.

I felt the familiar wash of fear when I landed my triple lutz wrong on the ice last spring. Oh no. I thought as I pulled my arms in close to my chest and spun in the air. Oh no, I'm not going to stick it.

My whole body was completely tense, and I never felt more scared in my life.

I felt my left leg touch the ice, then slip backwards.

I went flying backwards and time seemed to pass by slowly.

I looked up and saw Dallas on his feet covering his mouth in shock.

I looked farther up and saw Harry, Niall, Liam, Zayn, and Louis all pressed up against the glass panel. Their eyes wide and mouths gaped.

I failed. I thought. I fell on the ice in front of the whole world.

That was the least of my worries though. I finally felt the back of my head WHAM against the cold ice.

I felt something crack, the ice, and then my whole world went black.