Savior >> Joshler

Chapter 4 >> The Cry

Saturday, May 10, 2014
(same day)

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Tyler

"Tyler, is something wrong?" he asked, opening my car door and squatting down next to me. I wanted to tell him but I couldn't move. I felt the tears start to form in my eyes. My vision got blurry. My head started spinning. Josh seemed to be getting further from me but I knew he wasn't moving.

Blackness.

**********

"Please, wake up, please, wake up, please, wake up" I heard someone muttering. "I need you so much. You don't even know. I need you to wake up," the voice was shaky and holding back tears. I knew what that sounded like.

I heard it often when I was growing up. All of us always held back the tears. Especially mom. She was really bad at it, though. She always let her voice crack. We could all see right through her.

Get up, you weak bitch!

Blackness.

************

I was moving back and forth in a ball shape. Someone's arms tightly wrapped around me. They were crying. My eyes slowly opened. I could tell by the tattoo on his arm. It was Josh. I moved my head to signal that I was awake.

"Tyler!" He yelled, holding me tighter. "I thought you'd never wake up. I was so worried," he wiped tears from his face. I wrapped my arms around his torso, still not saying a word. I closed my eyes again, trying to hold back tears. It didn't work for long. My eyelids were like an unstable dam that almost immediately broke under pressure of the water, which were my tears.

I grabbed Josh tighter, making me feel safe. The tighter we held each other, the more I felt like someone was actually there. Not just lying like...

You're really going to bring that up, again? I'm tired of hearing about how "horrible" your life is, Joseph.

"J-josh," I stuttered, trying to make my train of thought crash.

"Yes, Tyler?" He sincerely asked.

"I-I'm sorry for ruining our date," I sighed deeply with smaller amounts of tears streaming down my face. I felt one of his tears hit the top of my head.

"No, Tyler, it wasn't your fault at all. Please don't blame yourself for any of this," Josh pleaded.

"I should ha-have told you, Josh."

Yeah you should have, dumbass.

"Don't blame yourself."

"That's where I met Matthew. And found out... everything. My mom too," my hands balled into fists, clenching Josh's sweatshirt.

Let go you crybaby!

"Oh, Tyler, I had no idea. I feel so bad. Please forgive me," Josh cried.

"There's nothing to forgive you for, silly," I laughed a little, looking up at him.

"I never would have thought that the arcade was where..."

"Where my life began to fall apart?" I finished.

Funny. Your life is never going to stop falling apart.

"Y-yeah," he stuttered, "how come you never told me?"

"I didn't think once these past years to tell my therapist where I met my half-brother-that-only-came-along-because-my-damn-father-was-having-an-affair-on-my-mother-who-is-now-even-more-depressed-than-me-and-it-didn't-help-that-his-girlfriend-was-there-too in an arcade," I mashed my words together, getting that over as soon as possible.

He probably didn't understand a word of that. Annunciate next time.

"I'll never take you there again, I promise," Josh swore.

"I'm glad we got to cry together," I laughed, wiping tears from my face, Josh following suit.

"Me too, Tyler, me too."

He lied. Everyone lies. Don't ever believe anyone but me.

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A/N: Once again, I hope you enjoyed what I'd call a train wreck of a book. But thank you for reading!! -Alex