Bellarke One-Shots

Falling in Love

Authors note, this is a bit more geared towards an Octavia and Bellamy conversation. But there is definitely Bellarke, just be patient.

Octavia's POV

I catch him staring at her a lot, his eyes following after her when she leaves, for just a moment too long. I see his lips curl up slightly when her name is mentioned in a conversation. I've seen him laugh when he's talking to her, and Bellamy doesn't just through laughs around casually. He's just not a happy enough person to, but he is when he's with Clarke. He's actually a happy person.

I remember the first time I realized he loved her. She was running towards him and he was staring at her, as if in shock. And when she threw her arms around his neck, he was actually too stunned to move. I felt his cold heart, iced with layers of self made protection, melt in her embrace and I smiled as he finally wrapped his hesitant arms around her waist. I had laughed to myself when I heard him smell her hair and watched as he nuzzled his head in the crook of her shoulder. He was so in love, it wasn't even funny, but it was at the same time. I remember saying out loud, "Now there's something I thought I'd never see." I didn't think I would ever see my big brother fall in love, but he had. I never said anything again, but I always wondered why he never went for it. She clearly liked him too. They both thought they were so sly, stealing glances when the other wasn't looking, finding subtle, but necessary ways to touch, and hugging in celebration. But I saw, I watched them fall in love. And I've been watching them waste time everyday since.

It was a normal night until I caught Bellamy coming out of Clarke's room late one night. I raised my eyebrow suggestively at him. He just shook his head as if to say, 'No, Octavia. Nothing happened and I may even be slightly disappointed about that.'

"You want to talk, big brother? It's been a long time since we just talked." I put the ball in his court, giving him the opportunity to talk about Clarke, as I knew he so desperately wished to.

"Yeah, talking would be nice." He said and I followed behind him, silent all the way to his room.

I sat next to him on his couch and turned to face him, but he just kept staring forward, focusing hard to keep everything together.

"What was it like to fall in love with her?" I asked breaking through his wall, so very bluntly, and I watched as slowly he crumbled and waited a few minutes for him to open up to me.

"That's crazy, O. She's just a friend, okay?" Bellamy said with the slightest tone of disappointment. I almost didn't catch it, but it was what I had been listening for.

"What was it like to fall in love?" I asked him again, but more slowly this time.

He sighed and after a long time he finally spoke, staring straight ahead at the wall. "It was slow." Bellamy began with a timid voice. "It grew from dislike to respect to friendship, from liking the little looks she'd give me to wanting more to always looking for her face in a crowd, to wanting to touch her and finding subtle ways to. It went from a friendship to wanting more so very slowly and yet all at once. It went from her being good to have around to wanting her to not being able to breath until I was with her. She became a comfort and developed into a necessity to be happy. She made me happy and I haven't been happy for a very long time, O. I told her things, things I couldn't even admit in my head in the dead of the night. I felt as though I could tell her anything and everything. I could trust her to know who I was and with everything else. And it went from needing to keep her safe as the only medic to needing to keep her safe for my sanity. I needed her to be safe. I needed her and I wanted her and everything was better when she was standing next to me. Everything was okay as long as I could feel her touch and hear her breathe steadily in and out. As long as I could smell her wonderfully comforting familiar smell and look into her icy blue eyes. And then one day the slow burn burned so incredibly fast and hard as I looked into her eyes and realized I couldn't live without her. I mean I could survive without her, but never again would I fully live my life and enjoy every breath, unless she was there just to be next to me. And I long for to the day she says she loves me too."

I breathed in and then out again. Wow, that was so completely open and not what I was expecting at all. I was glad he's said that though. Now, he could move forward.

"Bellamy, you need to tell her. She needs to know you feel that way. If there's anything I learned about falling in love," I paused and tried to steady my shaking voice. Lincoln. I breathed in and out again. "If I learned anything, it's that you gotta get over this stupid emotional block we build up in our minds. Lying to ourselves saying there's time and we can wait, denying there's anything to wait for because we aren't really in love, we are just confused. We can't do that, Bellamy. Tomorrow isn't guaranteed, heck five minutes from now isn't guaranteed. You need to tell her you love her, or else one day she'll be gone and you'll be sitting here thinking how stupid you were for not, and wishing you would have instead of wasting time. Don't waste a gift as precious as time Bellamy." I turned my head to look at him. He had tears in his eyes, but the stubborn man he was would never let them fall in front of his little sister. So, I leaned into him and hugged him so hard that maybe all his broken pieces would fit back together and he'd be fixed. But when I pulled away, I still saw the brokenness in his eyes.

" I now it's a cheesy line." I said forcing Bellamy to look me in the eye. "But love fixes all wounds and time fades all scars. You are not the person you were in the sky and neither is she. Time will fix you Bellamy, but love will make you complete. And don't you dare try to live without love, because it is everything. It is in the light and the darkness, and you may be darkness, Bellamy, but love exists there too."

"When did you grow up and become so wise, O?" Bellamy asked and I had to laugh, he always made me laugh. "I know you didn't get that from me."

"Stop stalling, Bellamy. Man up and tell her you love her." I stood up and extended my hand down to him. He took it hesitantly and I yanked him up.

"Thanks, O." He said and hugged me quick before turning the knob to open the door and change his future for the better.