I'm sorry brother ⚣ vkook ⚣ completed

Chapter 11

Sometimes it felt as if god was playing a twisted game on me. As if he wanted me to die as soon as possible and with the worst ending possible. Although, sometimes he seemed to have a conscious that was plagued with guilt and gave me a fleeting moment of mercy.

"Thank you doctor" I smiled as he turned to leave the room, closing the door softly. I laid back in the bed in exhaustion, breathing calmly. I was about to fall back asleep when the door opened once again.

"Taehyung!" Someone gasped. I looked at the person and saw a worried and shocked Beakhyun. He walked forward into the room and sat down in the chair besides me. His hand reached out for mine and held on to it with s tight grip.

At that moment Jungkook and his five friends walked in. They were all frowning and looked worried. It made me feel guilty, this was supposed to be a happy day, in which we were to be happy for Jimin and Jungkook, but instead I was selfish enough to take the moment and make everyone worried.

"How are you feeling? Are you tired? Do you have a headache? What did the doctor say?" Beakhyun asked, not a single breath was taken in between the words.

"Slow down, I'm fine, the doctor said I'm fine" I smiled at him. Beakhyung stared at me in suspicion. "I was just a bit dehydrated and didn't get enough sleep, I'm sorry to ruin the party for you"

I saw Jungkook frown and leave the room without a word. Namjoon followed him with a quick bow. Jin had sent the other three after them and sat down on the chair on my other side.

"Taehyung what's going on? Please, I need to know" Jin asked carefully. I gulped and stayed silent. "Are you sick?"

It was quiet for a good minute before I slowly nodded, the beanie the doctor gave me at my request was hiding my head all the time. I pulled it off to let him see the complete nothingness that was underneath it. I bit my lip, both in shame and disgust as Jin gasped.

"Cancer stage IV" was the only word I said, a lone tear fell from my eye. I quickly wiped it away and put the beanie back on, covering my ears.

"I-I don't know what to say..." Jin hesitated, it was understandable. "H-how long? Why didn't you tell me- us, all of us, we could have helped. We are your friends"

I chuckled softly and shook my head, laying back into the bed again.

"It's been two months since the first treatment, I don't want to bother you, or anyone else with all of this" I sighed and closed my eyes.

"You haven't told Jungkook yet have you?" Baekhyun frowned. My eyes shot open and I stared at the ceiling before a small 'no' escaped from my mouth.

"You should tell him" Jin said surprised.

"I-I... I-I can't" I tried hard to get the words out as my eyes got blurred with tears. "I-I don't w-want him to worry I-I want him to b-be happy"

No one said a words after that, silence filled the room until the doctor came and told me I had to rest and sent the others away. They left with a quick goodbye.

"Do you know what your decision is yet?" He asked once we were alone. I nodded stiffly.

"The answer is no" I closed my eyes and turned away from him. He walked out and the door closed. I shut off the lights with a remote on my bedside table and let myself relax completely.

I stared out the window, only a bright blue sky could be seen. The birds flew enthusiastically and freely, not a single care in the world. Why could they be free but I couldn't? Why did they deserve to live and I didn't? Is this really your plan with me God? Did you make me just to let me live such a short life?

I shut my eyes off to the image and tried to clear my mind, drifting off to sleep.

It wasn't until midday the next day that I was allowed to go home, after I had taken care of all insurance and money issues that had arisen. I decided I would go to Chanyeol and Beakhyun's place before going to mine. I sat in the bus and waited until their stop came by, where I got off and walked the remaining distance slowly. I made sure to have small breaks, taking longer than I intended to to get to their front door.

"Teahyung?" Chanyeol asked surprised as he opened the door. "You were released already? Why didn't you say so, we could've picked you up"

"Don't worry, I like to think I'm not completely useless" I waved him off and walked in the house. "I-uhhm have something to discuss though"

"Of course, just sit at the table, Beakhyun is still in the shower, so we'll have to wait if you want to tell both of us" Chanyeol sat besides me on the couch while I twiddled with my thumbs.

"I'll wait" I smiled and leaned back into the couch. "So how's life?"