Dark (A Louis Tomlinson story.)

Chapter 61- Is The Old Lou Back?

Amanda's POV


I had a miscarriage. We don't have kids. We are just stuck with depression. It's been a week since Louis and I found out and we barely have spoken since then, we barely interact anymore. We haven't spoken at all for three days and I don't even remember when the last time I hugged or kissed him was. I barely even remember what his lips feel like when they are pressed to mine. It's hard. We both ended up really excited for these kids but now we won't be having them, we won't be having any children now. Of course we could try again but I don't want to, I'm afraid it'll just happen again. Louis took it hard but I definitely took it harder. I spent a whole day crying and Louis was too upset to even try to comfort me. We haven't even been sleeping in the same bed. I sleep in the bed and he sleeps on the couch, it's like we don't care about each other anymore, it's like the other one doesn't even exist anymore.

Louis is gone to the store getting some groceries and I have just been sitting on the bed in our bedroom looking at the engagement ring he had given me. I slipped it on my finger, admiring the beauty of the ring. A sigh rolled out from my lips as I slid it back off my finger and set it down on the small table next to the bed. I heard a quiet knock on the door before Louis slowly pushed it open, hiding something behind his back as he looked at me.

"I uh, I got this for you," Louis mumbled, pulling a rather large teddy bear out from behind his back. The teddy bear was a dark brown color and held a stuffed heart in his arms that said 'I Love You.'

I managed a small smile as he crossed the room, handing me the teddy bear. "Thank you," I said quietly, looking down at the bear in my arms.

"Listen, Amanda, I still love you so much and I'm sorry for not being there for you lately, I know this must be really hard for you. I'm your fiancé and I'm supposed to help you but I have just been ignoring you, I'm so sorry," he murmured, taking my hands in his as he sat down in front of me on the bed.

"It's okay Lou, I don't want you to try to help me, you can't help me, this is just one of these things I need to get over by myself," I mumbled, looking into his eyes for a moment before I quickly looked back down at the bear.

"I understand, y'know we could always try again if you want," Louis murmured.

"I know but I don't want to try again, I'm just scared it'll happen again and we will just be even more devastated," I replied quietly, biting my lower lip.

"Amanda, please look at me," Louis said quietly.

When I didn't look up at him he let go of one of my hands and used his finger to tilt my chin upwards so I was looking at him. I pushed his hand away almost as soon as I saw his face before I stood up, dropping the teddy bear to the floor. I walked out of the room, a few tears trailing down my cheeks. I couldn't even look at him without thinking about the kids we could have had but now won't ever get to see. I heard Louis stand up and follow me out of the room and down the stairs but I didn't say anything.

"Where are you going?" Louis asked as I grabbed the car keys. When I didn't answer he grabbed my wrist and spun me around to look at him yelling, "Amanda!" As soon as he saw the tears rolling down my cheeks his face softened. "I'm so sorry baby," he murmured, reaching up to wipe the tears away.

I slapped his hand away and pulled my wrist out of his grip. I pulled my jacket on as well as my shoes before I walked outside towards the car. I slid into the passenger seat, starting the car as Louis got into the passenger seat.

"Where are you going?" Louis asked again.

"Louis, get out of the car," I said sternly without replying to his question. I just stared out the windshield at the house, gripping the wheel tightly. I didn't want to look at him.

When he didn't get out I turned the car off and threw the keys at him angrily. I got out of the car, slamming the door behind me before I began walking down the driveway. It didn't take long for Louis to grab my wrist, pull me to him, and pin me up against the car so I couldn't even move.

"Let me go!" I yelled trying to get away from him. I wiggled in an attempt to wiggle out of his grip, that didn't work. I couldn't push him, he was using his hands to pin my hands above my head on the car and I couldn't kick him because his knees were pressed to my thighs so I couldn't really move my legs that well. Even if I managed to kick him it would hurt me more than him, his knees would just dig further into my thighs and I would barely even touch him.

"Amanda, just answer me, please baby," Louis murmured quietly, looking down at me with a slight frown tugging at his lips.

"Just let me go!" I screamed still trying to get away from him. He tightened his grip causing me to yelp in pain but he didn't seem to care that he hurt me.

"Just answer the goddamn question and I will let you go!" Louis yelled. He suddenly seemed to have a major shift in moods.

"I don't have to tell you anything! You're not the boss of me therefore you don't have to know everything I do!" I screamed angrily.

His face grew bright red with anger and his jaw was clenched tightly as he stared down at me. He looked pissed. His grip tightened even more and I wanted to scream out in pain but I didn't. I didn't scream because maybe that's what he wanted, maybe he wanted me to scream in pain but I wouldn't give him the satisfaction of that, never would I give him that.

"Where the hell were you going?" Louis growled, his face centimeters from mine.

I looked at him for a moment before I spat in his face angrily. I shouldn't have done that. He slapped me in the face so hard I would've fallen if he wasn't pinning me to the car. Louis then gripped the collar of my shirt and threw me to the pavement driveway before he climbed on top of me, straddling my waist.

"Maybe you should answer my questions," Louis growled in my face.

"I don't think I will," I replied angrily. I was in a lot of pain, yes, but I was also really mad at him not only for hurting me but he was also becoming controlling by not letting me go anywhere without telling him.

He clenched his teeth tightly, his jawline protruding immensely. Louis raised his fist and it clashed with my face, the metallic blood taste instantly filling my mouth.

"Amanda?!" A familiar voice yelled. Harry soon ran over to us, pushing a now wide-eyed Louis off of me before he pulled me to my feet, wrapping his arms tightly around me.

"Oh my god Amanda, I'm so so sorry, I-I don't know what got into me," Louis murmured as he walked over to Harry and I.

I pulled away from Harry, standing in front of him as I turned to look at Louis. "I can't believe I was going to marry you, you prick," I mumbled before I spat in his face, leaving his face a bit bloody now.

I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand, smearing blood on my hand. Louis' mouth dropped open and his eyes widened even more as he took in my words. He opened his mouth to speak but before any words left his lips Harry grabbed my hand and pulled me down the driveway and helped me into the passenger seat. He got into the drivers seat as Louis began racing down the driveway towards the car, a few tears rolling down his cheeks. Just as Louis was about to reach the car Harry pulled out of the driveway and drove down the road. Louis collapsed at the end of the driveway, covering his face with his hands.

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First off I would like to say, sorry I took so long to update, I had writers block and I had no clue what I wanted to happen. Second off, that chapter actually surprised me, that's not how I wanted it to end up but that's sort of the way it went as I was writing it. I love you all xx