Training Wheels {Zerkaa}

{Chapter Seven}

23:18pm

"Guess who's got drinks!!" Harry shouts in excitement as he enters the room.

I fiddle with my fingers, feeling Josh's eyes burning on me. I shouldn't of told him. I shouldn't of said anything. But now he knows, it'll be so awkward. It'll be too awkward, and everyone will notice. Just don't look or talk to him, it will be easy.

"Ellie, you okay now?" Simon asks as he sits down next to me.

I don't reply, I don't even want to open my mouth. My throat feels dry and burnt.

"What's wrong?" Simon asks, noticing my eyes watering.

"I-I to-told him." I croak out.

"Told him what?" Simon questions.

He places his hand on mine. I slowly glance up at him and bite my lip. I can see Josh staring at me in the corner of my eye. Freya's on his lap, no surprise.

"I told him I liked him, he just walked out and left me." I explain, looking back down.

I let out a few silent tears.

"An-and now he won't speak to me." I add.

"Come on Ells, don't cry about it. Josh just needs time the think." Simon reassures as he places his hand on my shoulder sympathetically. 

I clench my fists, wanting to shout. But I have to control my anger, or I'll get myself in trouble. I bite my lip just enough to draw blood.

"He doesn't deserve time. He wastes it all on th-that slag." I growl. "He didn't deserve me."

My nostrils flares slightly and my eyes twitch in anger. I want to punch her, and slap him. I want to shout at him. But I can't. I'm too scared.

"How about you stay with me tonight? You can sleep in my bedroom and I'll take your mind off him, not in that way." Simon suggests.

I nod. I look up at Simon with a smile and bring him closer to me. I wrap my arms around his neck and pull him so our chests are touching, I cry softly. I missed Simons hugs, especially these ones. He always knew how to make me feel better. Simon isn't the guy that would jump on a girl. Me and Simon are close, too close to even do anything with each other.

"Thank you Simon." I sob.

Simon rubs my back with care and riffles my hair as soon as I remove myself from him.

"No problem kiddo!" Simon chuckles.

I playfully punch his shoulder and he falls down, pretending to be hurt.

"Ouch!" Simon cries dramatically in a joking manner.

I giggle, snorting causing us both to laugh.

"What are you two laughing at?" JJ asks.

I wipe the tears streaming from my cheeks and laugh a little more.

"Nothing." I smile.

//after a few drinks\\

I lay miserably on the sofa while everyone dances and has fun. I sigh as I take another sip from the fourth cup I've had. Personally, I handle my alcohol pretty well. Whereas Simon, he's all over the place.

"What are you doing laying here? Aren't you having fun with the others?" A recognisable voice asks.

I know who it is, so I look away.

"What's it with you?" I ask bluntly.

A stressful sigh escape his mouth.

"I didn't know, Ellie." Josh states.

I know what he's talking about. This is the part where he apologises for walking out on me like that.

"You clearly did know Josh. I made hints, I made it so fucking obvious." I mumble. "I tried, Josh. I really did try. But you were having none of it, so I just put up with it all."

"D-do you still like me in that way?" He asks.

I look at him, "to be honest, Josh, I don't know anymore."

"What do you mean?" Josh questions.

"You know exactly what I mean! That's what pisses me off Josh! You were too into her to even realise how I felt!" I rant. "I'm tired of repeating myself."

"You're my best friend!" Josh exclaims.

"Are you sure Josh? Is this how you treat your best friends? If so, I should of fucked off years ago!" I lower my voice as I can't be arsed to explain myself in an angry expression anymore.

Josh sighs.

"Look, Joshy, Freya's over there wondering where you were." I scoff.

Josh looks over at her, then back to me.

"I don't want to go over there." Josh mumbles.

"Ohh, that's the first. You're usually over there in her pants. What's so different now Josh? Is it because you've now realised? Or is it because you've seen what you missed out?" I tease.

"Fuck off." Josh snaps.

"So now you want me to fuck off? Make up your fucking mind." I shout.

"Stop being such a selfish cunt!" Josh yells back in my face.

"How am I fucking selfish?! I've looked after you and put up with your shit for the past ten years. But here we are now, fighting over that fucking arselick sitting in the corner wanting your attention." I push Josh.

"All you do is fucking cry! Move on Ellie, like you should of done once I asked out her six years ago!" Josh howls, his veins popping out on the side of his forehead.

"That's it Josh, humiliate me! Humiliate me in front of all your mates and make me look like the dickhead." I bark.

"That's enough! All you two do is fucking fight. I'm not having this. Do you think this is a good impression of yourselves? You're acting like three year olds." Simon interrupts.

I glance up at Josh once more before rushing out.

What have we became? We used to be so close, and now we're in the mess we were in before we left high school. We need to sort this out, immediately.