Pranks, Pajamas and Pretty Bad Puns

Chapter Five - I would unplug your life support to charge my phone

Chapter Five - I would unplug your life support to charge my phone

"My brother lives here?!" I asked, in amazement as I looked at the magnificent apartment that lay before my very eyes. It was as twice as big as our mansion.

"Yup," Jesse smiled down at me.

"So...er...I have a dick,"

"Really?" He asks, raising an eyebrow at me.

"Haha...fooled you! Happy April Fools!" I laughed, nervously.

He shook his head. "Definitely one of a kind,"

"Your face is one of a kind,"

I stopped. Did I really just say that? *facepalm*

"Isn't your mansion as big as this?" Jesse asked, quirking an eyebrow at me.

"Well, the proper one in England is like 20 times the size of this and not to mention is armed full of security guards who look like they're about to murder Donald Trump," I said, shaping my fingers into a gun shape and firing. Jesse chuckled and escorted me into the building.

"I have the perfect prank for my brother," I said to Jesse as he placed his palm on my back and pushed me forward.

"What is it?" he asked.

"I have a pie in my bag and-"

"You have a pie in your bag!?" Jesse asked, as his eyes widened.

"Yup, and it's full of food coloured expired yoghurt and  stinky cheese!"

"Ew,"

"I know right! It'll serve him right for drowning me in root beer last year. It took ages to come off," I sighed, as I remembered the terrible memory.

"My family is pretty normal compared to yours. I mean no rich multimillionaire father or evil stepmother who sluts off or dead mother-" he cut himself off as he saw my pained expression. "Oh, I didn't mean it like that. I'm sorr-"

"It's okay," I said, straining a smile.

It was true that my mum died two years ago due to cancer and my dad married again to a famous model who like half his age. Stephanie Le beau got married to my dad a year ago and I can tell you she hates my guts.

I was happy that dad found someone to love like mum but all Stephanie was doing was snogging off my dad's money. And that was not okay. I tried to tell dad but Stephanie would always give me her worst death glares. I did tell dad once but he never believed me. He said I'm just sad about mum leaving. I mean, I was. I was depression. I felt sick and lonely and sometimes I even used to self-harm. But Travis and Caleb found out so they used to take turns and help me enjoy life. I finally got out of depression about a year ago when my dad remarried and after Stephanie Le beau and her 'no good daughter' Brittany moved in, Caleb went off to live with his wife and Travis got a job abroad. And by job I mean stripper. And after they left I was left all alone so I decided to make the most of my life and I'm back to that stupid carefree human I am. If I am a human. What if I'm not a human? What if I'm an alien?

"Am I an alien?" I asked nothing particularly. When I realised Jesse was behind me I did made a weird face.

"I don't think so," he replied, unsure.

"Aww. I really wanted to be an alien. Then I can destroy Travis without getting in trouble," I whined.

"Ok, cupcake, get in the elevator," he said, steering me into the elevator. I got in and Jesse pressed the button. Another figure entered the elevator but the elevator was too dark to see who it was.