Just my stupid, lousy, rotten, luck.

Give Me a Chance

For the next couple of weeks, I was a little more than distracted, after Jess and I's run in with the wolf pack I was on edge and people were beginning to notice, Ed caught me on several occasions using salt instead of sugar and another time I burned my hand on hot oil, Ed kicked me out of class, making excuses for me, saying I was sick and needed to see the nurse, Noah gave me concerned looks but ultimately gave Ed and I permission to leave class. Ed repeatedly asked what's wrong with me but every time I would tell him it's nothing and he is getting mad, although it would seem he's not the only one, Jess was livid herself, she had sent the claw she found to the forensics lab in the station , Leo Steven, head of the forensic department and good friend of Jess took the project on in secret as a favor to her, he liked Silverstein as much as Jess did, so he agreed to run some tests on it and get back to her without involving Silverstein, however, this did not happen as the claw went missing before any test could be done, hence why she is so mad, you probably guessed by now it was me who took the nail, I snuck in when the wolves weren't there, and in case they did come back, I hid my sent with 3 bottles of cologne, effectively giving myself a headache, I borrowed a janitor's outfit and kept my head down. I had been there many times before so I know where the blind spots were, but no one there really knew me well enough to put a name to the face, anyway I took the nail and booked it out of there, I barred the nail at the bottom of an old plant pot my neighbor keeps out and planned to never tell another soul. Another thing that's been on my mind is the rest of Silverstein's pack being FBI, they look the part physically but with the blue eyed Joshua's ( if that's even his real name) bloodthirst, I don't think any of them would pass the psych evaluation, I groaned knowing exactly who I needed to ask for help with this, I'll have to ask Matty to do a little hacking for me.

Noah has also been on my mind, always, all the time, non-stop, I was avoiding him and he noticed, I pretended not to notice the pain in his eyes and my chest every time I turned from him, left class early, or ran out at top speed just to avoid talking to him. On multiple occasions, he's asked me out on another date and I blew him off, making excuses or just running away, Ed has a valid point, I am to easily swayed by sweet words, why would someone like Noah fall for someone like me? we are from 2 different worlds, 2 that when meet blood is spilled, you can't fall in love so quickly, so he has to be pretending, so I tried to convince myself that's true it's not real love, it can't be, so I'll take the pain, I will bear with it until I can't anymore, I want him to be happy more than I have ever wanted for anything else, and that happiness can't be achieved with me,  for him the pain will pass and he will move on, as for me ...... I will just have to wait and see. I was staring at the clock desperately hoping the minute hand would hurry to the 6 to signal the end of class,  I was using the pack as a distraction for the pain in my chest about avoiding Noah, so as soon as the bell rang I was gonna run the 2 and a half blocks to Matty's house and get him to see what he can find out about the pack and Silverstein. I internally signed at myself, on multiple occasions Matty would hack into the local police database to find out about local crimes when we were younger, Sky and I were always yelling at him not to hack into federal services, Ed and Bell would cheer him on, he did, however, stop when Tom started dating Jess and I'm pretty sure she has never found out about Matty spying on them, probably a good thing, after years of telling him to stop hacking, I'm changing my mind and asking him to hack, the FBI's server of all things.

Ed grabbed me by the arm bringing me back to reality, when I finally noticed the frying pan I was holding is now on fire, he took it quickly out of my hand "Sasha pay attention !" he screamed throwing the pan into an empty sink, he was about to turn on the water but I grabbed his hand " oil and water don't mix" I said grabbing a box of baking soda and pouring it over the pan, everyone was staring now, some laughing and others looking on with disapprovingly, I could feel my face heat up with embarrassment, and the fact that I almost burnt my face off from the flames, but mostly embarrassment, Ed spun on his heals" got a problem? piss off!" he yelled dragging me out of class,  they all quickly went back to their own dishes, he turned to face me glaring as he did so "the hell is wrong with you lately, are you trying to kill yourself or what?"  he fumed "this is getting really old" his expression softened "come on man, talk to me, what's wrong " I bit my lip and sighed " I'm just stressed, and ...... I've kinda been on a low for a while, and I just can't seem to keep the depressing thoughts away" okay well that's kind true, I just left out the part about killer werewolf's taking over the police department, that's a depressing thought that won't go away. He nodded and gave me a bro hug " you haven't been sleeping then either?" A nodded " just go home, take a shower, or a nap, punch a wall if you have to okay? I'll get your bag and send it back to you with Sky" " you guys going to the gym?" another nod, he walked back into class and I ran to the side exit as quickly as I could in case Noah tries to talk to me, another sharp pain, I shook my head dismissively and jogged off the property.