Just Kidding | ✔️

Chapter 27: She's Come Undone

♡

The rain is clattering against the window in fourth period, not a drop of sunlight to be seen for miles.

"Are you just going to keep looking at me, Rhodes, or are you going to talk?" I don't have to look up from the doll on the table to feel Cooper's gaze on me as it has been for the past thirty minutes.

"Well it is good to see that you are more of yourself today." He says.

"Can I let you in on a little secret?" I whisper. "It's all an act."

"Why?" He asks somberly.

"So no one asks if I am fine or okay. Those are the two things I just wish people would stop asking me." I cross my arms over my chest, finding the will to stare into Cooper's grey eyes. In the incandescent lighting of the classroom they almost look black.

"So then tell me Kyla, what do you want people to ask you?" He scoots his chair closer.

"I can't tell you that." I answer.
"And why not?"
"Because then it would defeat the whole purpose of you actually caring enough to ask it."

He is troubled by my answer I can see it in the way he shifts in his seat. Instead of saying anything that may change my outlook on him after all, he simply leans to the side and gazes over the body of the busty blonde across the aisle.

I scoff. Good to see he's the same old Cooper.

"What? Jealous?" Cooper asks.
"No, just disgusted."

Shrugging, he gets up from his seat and strolls towards the girl. From then on I have to listen to the giggles and moans every time he lays a hand on her thigh or her hip.

The bell rings for lunch and I make my escape, happy to leave. If Cooper is ever going to publicly fondle a girl then I would like to not partake in it, in any way shape or form.

The lunchroom is already crowded with people by the time I get to my table. "She's back." Bryce pulls me into his arms and when he lets me go I muster up a faint smile. "I'm sure you didn't miss me that much. It's been what, a day?" I take my seat.

"Well, Cooper sure did." Chloe chuckles under her breath, causing me to direct my eyes to hers.

"What?" I blink, bewildered to say the least. I know Cooper and I have grown closer but him actually asking for me? That's a new level I hadn't known we crossed yet.

"During lunch the other day he asked where you were." Riley chews on her turkey sandwich. Grinning as she continues saying, "he actually came up to this table."

"It was weird." Bryce's face scrunches up
"It was expected." Chloe chuckles.
"Remember," Riley leans into the center of the table. Directing her eyes onto Chloe. "Fifty bucks."

When I arrive home after school, it's silent. My brother is at work of course, I'm trying to be supportive but it's still upsetting.

Riley drove me home as she said she'd be happy to do since my brother is now working after school most days. I chuck my backpack to the floor and kick it around. Letting the rain from my clothes drip to the carpet in bottomless puddles.

I watch as one by one, water drops to the floor and everything from there just slows down.

First it's my heartbeat then my breathing and altogether the sounds of life slip away and I'm left with less than silence.

Taking in my surroundings, I watch as the dim room begins to spin. The rain outside falls in slow motion and my feet no longer support my weight. I set a hand against the wall with the other on my heart. Breathe. I tell myself and it almost works until I lean my head back and catch a glimpse of the frame hanging on the wall above the stairs.

My family. That's my family. . .we're smiling and laughing and--

"Oh God." I lean over, bracing my hands on my knees as I begin to hyperventilate.

They're gone. They're all gone! "No. No. No." I shake my head. "Please no." I will the tears away but they're clawing at my eyes and throat, soon I'm suffocating on my own agony. Crying turns into sobbing and in time my eyes resemble the rain outside.

It's hitting me all at once. All the loss, the heartbreak. I'm watching my old life slip away right before my eyes. I'll never see them again, the ones who made me smile and laugh and. . .

"I need Blake." I can hardly see anything through my blurry vision, stumbling around as I guide my hands in front of me, searching for my phone. I can't find it. I can't find anything! "Where is it?!" I scream.

It's okay, I don't need my phone. Where does he work? I ask myself.

I forgot, he never told me specifics. I can't remember any of it. Fuck!

Another wave of tears, harder and faster than last time falls, and so do I. Sliding down the wall I bury my face between my knees and I just cry. Blake is the only I know who can ease this horrible ache inside of me, he can help.

Suddenly Cooper comes to mind and my pain lifts just at the thought. Last time I remember he quelled my sorrow and even if I have no clue as to how, I can't afford to wait and find out. I need him. Now. Hate or not, I'm lunging for the door and I'm jogging into the stormy night and out of the neighborhood altogether.

The tears won't stop and it's killing me. The pain is so tormenting I fear I won't make it to Cooper's place that I hardly remember the directions to but my feet carry me themselves.

Thoughts of my parents and grandmother pull more emotions from inside of me. Rage, depression, dread. But I keep pulling myself forward. Soon the familiar view of the park is upon me.

It feels as if I've been running for years by the time I make it to Cooper's doorstep. Everything inside of me tells me this is a mistake, that I'm better off searching for my brother out in the cold rainy afternoon, but I'm already here. I can't back out now.

I choose the moment of bravery to throw my fist at the door and knock until my knuckles hurt. Several seconds tick by without an answer and I knock again then again and once I've run out of energy I give up. He's not coming.

Just as that horrible thought comes to mind, the sound of locks turning is followed by the door swinging open and there before me stands a shirtless Cooper Rhodes. A dim yellow light emits from behind him almost like an unearthly glow.

He jerks back at the sight of me, wiping a hand over what looks to be eyes that have just opened from a nap. Fuck, now I've woken him up with my own stupid problems. I shouldn't of come. I shouldn't of.

"I-I'm sorry I didn't know where else to go." The sobs are hysterical as I try to explain exactly why I'm on his doorstep. Shaking his head, Cooper steps forward and what he says next both excites and stuns me.

"God, you have no idea how long I've been waiting for you to show up at my door." He sighs, taking my arm quickly and pulling me into the house. My body collapses into his, warmth immediately overtakes me and I'm wrapped in security.

The door closes behind us and Cooper pulls me away from him. "We need to get you dry." He brushes a finger across my cheek and tucks a stray hair behind my ear.

At this point I don't care what he does or is planning to do to me. I give up, I let myself break down completely. He has seen me at my most vulnerable and that will never be unseen.

You have my heart Cooper Rhodes. Don't break it.