unforgivable ➸ finnick odair

E L E V E N

THE SONG DOESN'T BELONG TO ME

"Yesterday was a great resting day, but we're running low on food. I think we should go hunting today." I said to Everly as we hopped down from our tree. She nodded, checking her pack and grimacing.

"Definitely." She agreed readily, swinging her bag over her back again and holding her axe at the ready. It was quite late in the morning, nearly midday by the looks of it, and the forest was in full bloom. As we walked underneath the canopy of leaves overhead, occasionally ducking under a particularly low-hanging bunch of branches, the birds sang songs as they flew from treetop to treetop, their soothing notes ringing through the forest.

By what we presumed to be lunchtime, we had gathered a decent bunch of berries and had managed to shoot down 2  particularly fat birds that somewhat resembled those turkey animals that the capitolites liked. When cooked, the meat was greasy but still very filling and delicious. Everly and I shared one bird and then decided to cook the other one, but save it for another day. With our bellies and hearts full, we got up from our brief seat in a random clearing we had stumbled across and began to make our way back to our temporary home.

Then a high-pitched, decidedly feminine scream rang out in the air. We both paused and looked around frantically, trying to locate the source of the noise. Another scream pierced the air, this time seemingly filled with pain. Our eyes me as we realized simultaneously who exactly the scream originated from.

"MAY!" We screamed in unison as we rushed forwards, sprinting to where we thought the scream was. Sure enough, there was another scream, much louder and closer this time, accompanied with the sound of a body dropping to the ground with a thud. Heart thumping loudly against my chest, I burst into the clearing, Everly a mere second behind me, her axe held up and ready to kill.

Our youngest ally lay on the forest floor, a spear through her stomach and blood beginning to leak out of her wound. Bolt was frantically dodging arrows that came from the trees surrounding the area, fury rising in his normally soft brown eyes. All four careers had jumped the young duo, and when I saw the spear in Glitter's hand I saw red. Trident at the ready, I made to lunge at her, but someone beat me to it. 

Glitter's azure blue eyes widened as she toppled to the ground, a dagger in her chest. Bolt was breathing heavily, the blade that had previously been clutched in his hand gone. Taking advantage of the careers' surprise at their ally's unexpected death, Everly leaped onto Hero and jammed her axe viciously into his neck. Normally, the older boy would've been able to wrench her off of him, but by the time he came back to his senses the axe had already fatally wounded him. A horrible gurgling noise emerging from his damaged throat, Hero dropped to his knees and fell to the ground as Everly held up her freshly bloodstained axe once again, a menacing look on her face.

Then a strangled gasp emitted from someone behind us. I turned around, and a scream tore from my throat. Bolt, Everly and I all stared in shock and horror as blood began to seep onto Bolt's shirt from the wound made by the arrow firmly lodged in his chest. Whipping my head back around, I held my trident up, but Claudia had already disappeared and I saw a flash of brown hair in the treetops as Rhys swiftly followed his ally away from the scene.

Dropping to my knees beside Bolt, I took one close look at the wound and knew immediately that there was nothing we could do. Everly had evidently come to the same realization as she made no move to grab the leftover bandages from my bag. Time seemed to freeze around us; even the birds had fallen silent as Bolt's breathing became ragged and shaky. His brown eyes were wide and scared.

"I-I don't w-w-wanna di-ie," he whispered, fingers finding my own and holding on tightly, as if I was his anchor to the realm of the living. I squeezed his hand in an attempt to be reassuring, but I felt tears make their way down my face and I knew that I was failing. I had failed. Failed Bolt, only 14, still so small and innocent, wrongfully shoved into these brutal games. Failed May, who lay not far from her closest ally, so young, so much potential. 

They were just children.

"Shhh, it's okay. You'll be okay." Everly said quietly, flattening his wild brown hair. She was crying as well. Leaving Everly at my district partner's side, I went over to May. Her dark pupils were dilated in fear and her shirt was soaked in her blood. My hand gripped onto hers the same way I had with Bolt - her hand was clammy, but still warm. I heard two cannons boom in the distance - Glitter and Hero - but ignored them, instead focusing on my dying ally. 

No, not ally.

Friend.

"W-w-will you si-ing for me-e?" May forced out. I nodded despite my lack of singing talent and launched on, trying to ignore the fact that her skin was slowly growing cold.

"Don't you dare look out your window, darling," I began, voice cracking as tears kept streaming down my face. Some dripped onto her jacket, and I paused to wipe them away before continuing. "Everything's on fire. The war outside our door keeps raging on. Hold onto this lullaby, even when the music's gone. Gone." I saw her eyes begin turning into slits as her spirit fought to drift up to heaven, but something was stopping her. She wanted to hear the rest of the song. Swallowing the lump in my throat, I carried on, voice growing quiet. After everything, I at least owed her this one last song.

"Just close your eyes, the sun is going down. You'll be alright; no one can hurt you now. Come morning light, you and I'll be safe and sound." I finished, and I saw a blissful smile creep onto her face before her eyes slide shut and her harsh breathing ceased. A cannon boomed loudly, and, in a daze, I crawled over to Bolt, who was still feebly clinging onto his final string of life. 

"T-tell my family," Bolt whispered desperately, and I moved closer to hear his final words. "Tell th-em I'm s-sorry I c-c-couldn't come h-home." And with that, he let go. His eyes shut, just like how May's had, and his breathing gradually slowed to a stop. My fingers lightly brushed against his hand; his skin was cold.

The cannon sounded.

His string had snapped.

Everly and I remained frozen in our crouched positions for a while. A part of me refused to believe that May and Bolt, both so young and full of life, were gone. Gone like my father, here one day and then disappearing the next. Gone like all the tributes before them, about to be lifted up and stuffed into a wooden casket, preparing to be shipped back to their grieving relatives. 

Gone like Breeze, who I could've saved, could've volunteered for. Could've, should've, would've, didn't.  Gone like my little sister.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Everly gently lift Bolt's body. My eyes tracked her movements as she slowly dropped him next to May. I could feel my body making it's way over to her as she mechanically combed her fingers through their hair and straightened their clothing. Wiping the tears once again from my face, I lifted both of their hands and intertwined them. 

Now, they almost looked to be sleeping, if not for the drying blood on their clothes and their lack of breathing. Now, they almost looked normal. Two young children, holding hands and sleeping on the mattress of grass. The small smile remained on May's face. I ignored Hero and Glitter's corpses.

Sniffling, Everly began to shift through Glitter's backpack, and I reluctantly did the same, grabbing Glitter's bag and dumping the contents onto the ground. She had similar supplies to us, so I only grabbed her bag of dried fruit and bandages, shoving them into my bag and stuffing the rest pack into the dead girl's backpack. Everly did the same for Hero's pack, keeping only the food and matches and leaving the rest in the black bag.

"El. We need to go." Everly whispered. Reluctantly tearing myself from my friends' bodies, I swung my bag onto my back and trudged after my only remaining ally in this arena. As we left the clearing with the bloodstained grass, the birds began to sing once more, but this time their songs sounded sad and mournful. Even the birds had loved them.

The rest of the day flew past in a blur. All I remembered was returning to our tree and settling in my sleeping bag, staring at the sky emptily. That night, I couldn't help but stare at Bolt and May's images, all wide smiles and bright, twinkling eyes. Turning on my side, I tore my eyes away from the stars and threw myself into the world of my nightmares.

Come morning light, you and I'll be safe and sound.