Fighting Back

A hopeful year

a hopeful smile formed on my face. This place might not be so bad after all...

I look at the door overthinking as usual.

I'm already late... I need to go in. but they will stare at me. ugh late on the first day. I didn't even know where my class was!! ugh they're gonna think I'm stupid.

I take a deep breath and pull the door open. As I predicted... silence shadowed throughout the classroom.

damn it!

I stand the for a bit as the teacher looks around for a place for me to sit. At this point, I'm not looking for friends or any friendly faces. Josie is enough for now.

huh, "Josie" I like that.

The teacher points me to an empty chair, next to a very cute, shy looking boy.

He's.. so cute... 

I wanted to just stare at him forever but I didn't want to be weird. He looked at me and my heart sped up and my fists went stiff. 

Why is he making me feel this why... I don't even know him... but I... want to... He'll never like me though. Ugh, forget it, Brianna.

we'll call him cute boy for now, but "cute boy" kept looking at me for the rest of the class period. I could barely focus on the teacher's introduction. I just wanted to talk to him.

say something.. say hi. No. I'm too awkward. ugh, get over yourself. I can't.

*Bell rings*

talk to him. No. Cmon!. No. Ugh.

I walked out the classroom hoping, just hoping that him looking at me had to do with him actually wanting to talk to me. Annnnddd just as I thought he didn't even say, "Hi" *Sigh* I wait for Josie outside patiently for her class to let out. Kids burst out the doors, talking, laughing, smiling. Ah, how do they do it? I see Josie walk out with her head down. Oh? Is she shy again? I swear this girl goes in and out of personalities.

Josie see's me and instantly lights up like fireworks again. 

How does she do this?

Josie: HEY! you actually waited for me? so I guess this means were friends?...

Me Oh yeah, I guess if you want to-

I smiled inside. Yes.

Josie gets the energy of a new puppy when the owner comes home. She throws her arm around my neck and walks me to the break area.

Ow, ow, ow.

She was pulling my hair with every step. I stayed quiet, it's easier.  We walk into the break area, going to get food. We get in like and my heartbeat starts going rapid. 

That smell... it's him. wait how do I know that. creep. Shut up.

He got in line right behind me. I could just feel he was there, I didn't want to look back... but I did. and that was where it all started.

Just turn and wave. turn around! just do it.

I turned around and it was like he had a beautiful glow around him. He was perfect. I kept glancing behind me as he was laughing with his friends. 

He's so... beautiful. 

I look a little longer than I should have, and he noticed. He looked at me, making a perfect eye contact that made my heart shoot right out of my chest. It felt like if we were staring deep into each other's eyes for hours...

crap! I'm daydreaming. 

I shake it off and focus my eyes again. He waved at me with a cute little smile. I waved back almost starstruck with an awkward smile.

I love him...no there's no way. I don't even know him!! but I love him...

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A/N ok im getting used to this a little more its still kinda coming out weird but this is just the beginning. hang in there guys its gonna get good. 

- Love you guys :)