Mindless Self Indulgence (Fuck Off)

Self-improvment

"So we're going again next week?" I ask Lyn-Z walking down the city street the next day.

"Yup," She says kicking a rock on the ground.

"So where are we going?" I ask suddenly.

Lyn-Z had tried waking us all up about five hours after the concert. She wanted to take us somewhere but Steve and Kitty were too tired. Hell, she couldn't even wake Steve up.

"I'm going to show you around the ruins."

"But aren't all of the old cities abandoned and stuff?"

"No. There's a lot of people there. There's a whole black market going on and you can buy food."

"Buy food with what?"

"We trade and if you can get something from the City," she points at my backpack, "you could trade almost anything."

"So that's why you made me bring it," everything makes sense now.

"We're here," Lyn-Z announces after a few more minutes of walking.

The people are still weird as fuck. There are some people wearing masks like the superheroes in Lyn-Z's comic books and others look like mutant human beings.

I spot one person with goat horns and another with cat eyes.

"How are all these people like this," I whisper to Lyn-Z hoping that nobody has enhanced hearing powers.

"Before all of the big corporations brought everything there were a few companies who'd found out how to combine human and animal DNA. They were outlawed after the war but a few work secretly in places like this," she explains.

"Can I-"

She cuts me off. "No. You can't."

Some people pass by us with colored skin. Colored as in blue and grey and green not...you know.

"That's so cool!"

"I know but we have to get somewhere first," Lyn-Z drags me away from everyone.

Somebody's singing and playing the ukelele at a street corner.

"What the hell am I doing here? I don't belong here," her voice resonates over to me. Someone drops something in the box next to her. She gives them a head nod.

Lyn-Z walks ahead of me to a rundown building. "Do you have room for two more?" she says knocking on the door.

"Yeah," a man opens the door letting Lyn-Z in, I run after her.

We go into the basement where a bunch of people have accumulated. They leave some space in the center.

"What is this?" I ask eyeing the man in the center.

"Welcome to fight club!" The man yells answering my question.

"You're going to let people punch my face!" I hiss.

"Relax. Okay?" Lyn-Z orders, "take off your shoes."

"Why?"

"Because the sixth rule of fight club," she says impatiently.

"What is that!"

"Listen."

"...the sixth rule, no shirts no shoes," the man continues.

"Lyn-Z, my face is too beautiful. Do you see this?" I point at my face.

"It's just a fight. No big deal."

I turn back to the man because there is no arguing with Lyn-Z.

"And the undocumented rules," the man says, "don't be the one to pinch and scratch. And girls, don't say stop just because you broke your goddamn nail. And no hair pulling, that shit's fucking annoying."

"So you're gonna get beat up by a random stranger? What if you lose?" I ask in defeat.

"It's not about winning or losing," the first fight starts.

"Stop!" One of the men yell out through the blood.

The man points at me. "I've never seen you here before."

He beckons me forward. Lyn-Z pushes me and I topple forwards. A few people hold back laughs.

Someone else comes up to the center. We shake hands then we start circling each other.

I've never been in a fight before.

Out of nowhere he punches me. I take a few steps back.

That actually felt pretty good.

I punch him in the face. He punches me back and so on and so on. I taste blood. I pounce on the guy and start beating the shit out of him. He tries fighting back but this fucker has no chance against me.

He says stop when he's finally able to catch his breath. I let him go and stand over him. Then I help him up.

"You're pretty good," he says.

"Hell yeah I am!" I tell him. I make my way back to Lyn-Z.

"I told you it was great!" She's jumping up and down.

The guy points at her. He pairs her up with some other girl with black hair.

She comes back with a black eye and huge smile on her face.

"Lyn-Z," I grab her by the shoulders, "I understand everything."

She smiles even more.

"Give me fight club and let it be my bible."

"Self-improvement is masturbation!" Lyn-Z shouts.

We stay until the last fighter. We egg them on.

"Before you leave," the man takes the center again, "you all have a homework assignment."

Homework?

I thought I was done with that. I look over at Lyn-Z.

"Don't worry. It usually involves punching or destroying something."

"What!" I can honestly say that I love this homework assignment, whatever it is.

The man hands me an envelope as I make my way out of the basement.

I tear it open and the slip of paper inside flies out into my hand.