Mindless Self Indulgence (Fuck Off)

Evolution

"Lyn-Z could you perhaps give me some of those stickers?" I ask while she's packing.

She hands me a whole stack of them.

"And a marker," she hands me one.

I write on one of them and stick it in my pocket.

"You're on the news!" Kitty yells.

I rush over to the TV.

"-police are coming in from other cities to stop the riot from spreading," the reporter says.

"It's really happening?" Kitty asks.

"Yup."

"You don't think that this is a bit spontaneous?" Lyn-Z asks me.

"Mindless self indulgence," It's the answer to her question.

"That's what we're all about," she resumes packing.

"Hey, Steve!" I yell, "Pack as much coffee as possible!"

"'Kay!" he says back.

***

"I had to wake these motherfuckers up to bring them here," I yell at the crowd, "Do you know how much waking up hurts?"

The crowd screams.

"And-we looked inside and you had like," I start counting on my fingers, "three cops tied up. That was nice of you to do that considering the fact that there're going to be more coming here!"

We had to drag our equipment all the way over here in one of Jack's trucks. That was a pain in the ass.

"Start the song already!" someone yells.

"Alright!" I yell back.

***

"So you have the cops in the cells?" I ask Sam.

He nods triumphantly.

"So now we wait until the other cops come and we tell them that we have hostages. They won't get in but we won't be able to get out because they'll have us all surrounded."

"How do you know that's going to happen?" Brody asks.

"It's cause I'm psychic!" I yell at her face. She gives me a look and decides not to answer me.

"When do you think they'll get here?" Sam asks.

"I don't know! Being psychic doesn't let you know everything!"

"It kind of does," Brody interrupts.

"You know what kind of food they give to the prisoners here?" I ask Brody.

She shakes her head slowly with a frown on her face.

"It's this gump that has the necessary nutrients and fiber to let you survive. One week on that and Brussels sprouts will taste like candy," I threaten.

Brody gets up and leaves.

"I don't know how you just did that," Sam says.

"What?"

"She never shuts up," Sam explains.

"Like I said, I'm psychic."

I spin around on the swively chair I'm in. "Why does that start with a p?"

Sam just shrugs his shoulders.

"We're just wasting letters with words like that. What's the point in c and k? They make the same sound."