Forwards // Book Two

Chapter 17.

Author's Note:

Thank you so much to everyone who has read, voted and commented on this story! Every read, vote and comment honestly means so much to me! More than any of you could ever imagine! I love this story and I love every single one of you and I hope you know how much I mean that! You all have helped my dreams to come true. People are reading my story right now and actually liking it which is completely insane to me! So, thank you! Thank you so much! I really hope that you're all enjoying the story! We're on chapter 17 which means that we don't have a lot of chapters left! I think that I'll end the story somewhere between 25-30 chapters, so please vote and comment as much as possible! There's not much time left to do so! Thanks so much! - Sarah

I sit in the chair, staring at a sleeping Gracie in my arms. All is currently well in the world. I spoke to that shrink which seemed to help a bit. He gave me some medicine and coping mechanisms that I've been using to help keep myself calm. I haven't had any recent nightmares either. Life has been rather quiet actually.

I still haven't heard from Lucy. I stopped trying to contact her a few days ago. I figure if she wants to talk to me or see Gracie, she knows my number and where we live. Maybe she just doesn't care anymore and absolutely hates me. I would understand if she did. I was cruel to her. I treated her like a child when I only have one child to care for.

Gracie squirms in my arms and gently opens her hazel eyes, staring up at me. A brief smile stretches across her face as she reaches her hands up to touch my face. I smile down at her and lift her closer to me, allowing her to touch my face with her tiny hands. She places her hands against my smooth cheeks as she squeals in delight. She's been more verbal lately. She's definitely finding her voice in this world.

"Hey sleepyhead..." I whisper, smiling down at her.

Baby noises.

"Do you want me to sing you a little song Gracie? I know your favorite..." I whisper, rocking her back and forth lightly.

More baby noises and a brief yawn.

"I know you've never loved the sound of your voice on tape you never want to know how much you weigh. You still have to squeeze into your jeans but you're perfect to me..." I sing lightly, smiling down at her as I sing.

"And then Uncle Niall and I both sing..." I whisper, "I won't let these little things slip out of my mouth, but if it's true, it's you, it's you they add up to. I'm in love with you and all your these little things..."

"And then Uncle Niall..." I laugh, "You'll never love yourself half as much as I love you, and you'll never treat yourself right darling but I want you to...if I let you know, I'm here for you, maybe you'll love yourself like I love you...oh..."

"And I've just let these little things slip out of my mouth, cause it's you, oh it's you, it's you they add up to. And I'm in love with you and all these little things..." I finish, smiling down at Gracie.

Hey eyes are open wide in awe and her tiny pink lips form into a wide smile. She's completely overjoyed. I lean down carefully and place a gentle kiss on her forehead. She immediately squeals again and places her hand in her mouth, ready to get baby slobber all over her new outfit.

"Ya know Gracie, that was your mum's favorite song..." I whisper as I lean back in the chair, staring over at the photos across the room. "I loved her more than anything. Well, before I knew about you of course. I would have done anything for her. When she was pregnant with you in fact, I made many late-night trips to the market for her cravings..."

"I didn't deserve her. She could have done a helluva lot better than me. I mean, look at me and then look at her and you'll know exactly what I'm talking about. I'm sure you'll grow up to be just as beautiful as she was. Just make sure that you don't marry a ol' chump like me okay? You can do better than me. You can have your Prince Charming but make sure that he doesn't have any crazy tattoos okay?" I laugh, looking down at her.

She doesn't pay me any attention. She's too distracted by her hands.

"I don't impress you unless I'm singning, huh?" I ask, smirking gently. "I guess you're just like every other girl on this planet Gracie. It's all in the voice..."

The doorbell rings throughout the house as I finish that sentence. The sudden noise stirs Gracie as she jumps gently in my arms. I slowly stand up, clutching onto her tightly. We both make our way down the stairs, towards the front door.

"Hello?" I say, opening the door.

"Harry!" Lou squeals as she holds onto a toddler Lux.

"Lou! Lux!" I say, surprised by their presence.

"We thought we would come by and see how everything is going!" She says, setting Lux down.

"Of course! Sure, come in..." I say, stepping back so that they can enter our home.

"How is this precious girl?" Lou asks as she makes faces towards Gracie.

"Good! She's getting big isn't she?" I smile, kissing the back of Gracie's head.

"Yes! It's amazing how they grow isn't it?" She asks, sliding her sunglasses into the pocket of her shirt.

"Yeah, do you want to hold her?" I ask with a shrug.

"Of course! Hand her over Styles!" She laughs, stretching out her hands.

I gently place Gracie into Lou's arms as I lean back and watch how Gracie does. At first she whines a bit but is quickly distracted by the glasses that were just placed into Lou's shirt pocket. I laugh and kneel down to see Lux.

"Hey there Lux, how's Uncle Harry's favorite toddler?" I ask, holding up my hand to give her a high five.

Lux just squeals and slaps her small hand across my mine.

"How is everything?" I ask, standing back up.

"Fine. Just busy with work..." Lou shrugs, smiling down at Gracie.

"Yeah. I need to get back to work..." I whisper with a nod.

"Are you sure?" She asks, looking back up at me.

"Yeah. I'm going stir crazy here in this house. I need to do something..." I say, walking into the kitchen.

"Have you talked to management?" She asks.

"No, not yet but I'm going to..." I say, pulling a juice out of the refrigerator for Lux.

"Are you thinking just music or a possible tour?" She asks with a shrug.

"Not sure yet really..." I shrug.

"Well, what about Gracie?" She asks as she nods down towards Gracie.

"What about her? I mean, if we go on tour she'll just have to come with me..." I shrug.

"Yeah, I guess..." She whispers.

"What? You don't think it's a good idea?" I ask as I take a sip of water.

"It's not that, it's just..." She begins, "do you really think that you're ready for that?"

"I can't stay this way forever Lou..." I whisper.

"I know..." She nods with a reassuring smile.

"Besides, Gracie needs a dad who's doing something with his life. Not just some guy who sits around the house all day changing diapers and feeding her..." I laugh.

"Yes but you now understand how hard it is to take care of a child..." She laughs.

"It's the hardest thing I've ever done..." I laugh.

"But the best?" She asks, smiling up at me.

"Oh, definitely the best..." I nod with a smile.

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