There is a knock on the dressing room door. 15 minute warning. Ryan stands up from the couch and turns to Josh.
"Hey kid, can you give us a second"
Ryan looks at me and smiles and I have no idea what's going on anymore.
Josh shoots up from the couch and moves toward the door. "Sure thing, boss" and then closes the door behind him.
Alone. We are alone. I see the look in Ryan's eyes and know exactly what he's thinking. Um, no. We have 15 minutes and we are talking about this.
Ryan moves to join me on my couch and I cross my arms over my chest. I'm not going to look at him. I need to find the words. My brain goes blank. The sickness and the anger fighting for dominance in my stomach.
"Hey?" He says softly. A question. How does he not get this. I know. I fucking know.
I turn to him "Who is Josh?" and I can't fight the bile that has risen to my throat.
Ryan looks confused "Josh? You just met him."
I straighten my back "No. Who is Josh? Why is he here? Is he a roadie because I certainly didn't see him doing anything remotely work like." The anger and the hurt mixing in my tone
"What are you so pissed off about?" He barks
Oh, are we from fighting now? Good. Because after I kill Josh, I'm going to kill you.
"Ryan. Why do you have some fucking kid hanging all over you? Why is he sleeping on your bus? Why is he here?" I can't contain the rage anymore. Between sickness and anger, anger wins.
"He's 22" he says like it answers anything at all.
I'm speechless. I have nothing to return to that.
His eyes burn through me "What is your fucking problem? You came here. You showed up here. I didn't tell you to come. Fuck this. I have a show. I don't have time for this."
He gets up from the couch and I spring up after him "We are TALKING about this!" I yell towards the door.
He turns to face me. "Later, Bren" and walks out of the room.
Perfect. NOW I'm Bren.
