That Good Night // phan

-7-

Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
-
Phil, this one is going to be heavy. I have some secrets that I never told you. This is about the year I wanted to move out, and away from you.

It was during the family holiday with Martyn and Cornelia. Everyone was so sweet.

We were on one of our beach dates. I loved our beach dates. But it was different this time. We met a fan. On the beach.

I don't remember her anymore with my old age, I think it was Jasmine or something like that. She saw us holding hands.

It was a coincidence, she wasn't stalking us, but you thought she was. You denied that we were dating but pushed it to the next level, you said that you would never date me. I knew it was to hide our secret. I'm sure you thought you had done it to keep me happy. But it didn't. I had just rebranded, I was building up my confidence to come out. Yet you ruined it.

I never told you any of this. I thought I was a disappointment. I did come out in the next few months, but it didn't matter. I was hurt, and I made plans for us to take a break when we got back to London. Luckily I talked to Cornelia.

She helped me through it all. She was there when I felt like no one else was. She was one of the reasons I came out in the summer that year. She made me feel confident with myself and our relationship.

So why am I telling you about this if things ended up well in the end? Well, I want you to go see Cornelia and tell her that I am grateful. If this gets to her, that means I never got the chance to say goodbye. Thank you Cornelia, wherever you are.
>•>