That Good Night // phan

-8-

Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
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I remember crying for hours. Happy tears that is, tears of triumph that I had finally done it. I had finally come out to my subscribers. Obviously in the monthes leading up to that joyful day in august, I had left more and more hints that my coming out video was coming. But no one expected it. Not even you. I kept it a secret till I uploaded it.

I still remember you running into the lounge minutes after I pressed the upload button. You had just gotten the notification on your phone. You smiled and cried with me on the couch until finally I pressed the play button. We watched it in silence with only my voice on the screen audible with the few sobs and sniffles coming from the both of us.

The tweets were rolling in. Asking if 'phan' was real. I still remember us uploading a photo to twitter and Instagram of us basically confirming our relationship. That was a huge step for us. A huge step on the road to being together forever.

I knew at that moment that I would never leave you.
I know what you're thinking, I left you.

That's why I'm telling you all of this.
>•<