A Moment in the Crowd

Chapter 6: Because security will definitely buy that bullshit

Lily:

My mind is swimming with the thoughts of today as I'm jostled side to side by the intermittent stops of the subway. It's unusually packed, but I assume that it has something to do with the person who's car I just got out of. There are nothing but teenage girls on this subway, speaking with each other excitedly in hushed tones. If I hadn't just met the person I assume they're all gossiping about, I probably would be jealous and worried about whether they got to meet him too. I'm definitely not worried about that anymore.

I keep trying to remind myself that Harry Styles, yes the Harry Styles, just pulled me out of a crazy screaming crowd of fans. One which I probably would have joined had I not been pushed so close to his huge ass car. I was screaming, and almost crying, too, along with the rest of the girls in that crowd. I don't know what happened when I got so close to his car but something inside of me needed to know that he was happy. God, why do I care so much about this guy? I mean I have for years but, he was a celebrity crush to me then. Now he's... well he's a person. He was always a person before, I know that. I even thought of him as a person, hell, God knows I imagined how our conversation would go could we ever actually meet about a thousand times a day, but never did I think he'd pull me into his car. 

I can't think straight and my mind is rushing with thoughts of today's events. I can't believe he invited me to the concert, and backstage too? I swear I'm dreaming and I imagined the whole day. Maybe I did? I mean he didn't exactly give me tickets or anything to get to the concert tonight. Fuck. My mind seems to catch on.

He probably just wanted to get rid of me so he told me he'd give me tickets to the show. A bribe so that I would leave faster. I mean how am I supposed to get in anyway? 

"Hi I hung out with Harry Styles earlier today, could you let me in without a ticket or any other form of proof. Great, thanks."

Yeah because security will definitely buy that bullshit. I should have known better. I feel suddenly deflated by my new revelation. Any hope that I'd been clinging on to about how maybe he actually wanted me around is lost on me now. 

But it's not like he takes every fan up to the CN Tower with him? I offered to leave the second I realized what the fuck was actually going on, but he stopped the driver from letting me go, didn't he? Maybe I just dreamed all that shit up in my head. It wouldn't have been the first time I did it. 

As much as I'm trying to make sense of all this, I know what really happened today. The facts of it at least. We did go up the CN Tower, we did chat at Tim Horton's, because he really did ask me to show him around. 

The first person I texted when this all started was Paola. She's one of my only close friends so far and she doesn't even live in Canada. She lives all the way out in Florida and I can't help but laugh at my luck. I leave an international school, only to make friends with a girl in Miami rather than at my own new school. As pathetic as it sounds, she and I met online. We bonded over a book series at first, but the obsession slowly grew to none other than the biggest current boy band in the world. 

I'd sneakily texted her at Tim Horton's. The texts haven't stopped coming since I sent my brief one:

"I'm at a fucking coffee place with Harry Styles. I repeat HARRY STYLES."

She'd automatically assumed that he'd walked in while I was already there, and I haven't even had the time to explain it all to her yet. She's probably cursing me out for details as we speak but I don't exactly get reception on the subway. 

The rest of the subway ride home goes faster than I expected and I get out at the last stop. I haven't texted my mom to pick me up yet because I'm not sure if I want to tell her what happened. That and I need to text Paola the details. She probably won't believe me. I didn't even get a picture with him. Well that is if you exclude the paparazzi pictures, but it all seems like such a blurr.

"No Pao, wait let me explain. Oh my gosh you've slowed my phone with all your texts will you calm down. I didn't get a picture, the idiot that I am but you won't believe what I'm going to tell you. We spent the whole fucking day together. I swear by it. He invited me backstage tonight, but somehow I feel like he just wanted to get me to leave. I don't really know I can't even make sense of it"

I put my phone back in my purse, pleased with my brief description of the insane day I've just had, and then go to sit on the bench outside the subway station. I don't know why I'm sitting here, I should probably be getting some rest given I barely slept all night waiting outside Harry's hotel. I still can't believe I told him that. Way to sound like a fan.

I need to decide what I'm going to do tonight. If I should risk being humiliated and showing up at the concert with no tickets. I don't want to tell my mom about it, she'll probably tell me exactly what I'm thinking. Having made up my mind to return to the venue tonight, I text my mom to pick me up.