Message Man

NIN ETE EN

((Song is Taxi Cab by yours truly Twenty One Pilots. Wait to start.))

It was nearing the end of Josh's week long visit. I was sad for some reason, but it's not like I wasn't going to see him everyday still. It was summer after all.

Nonetheless I just couldn't shake the off feeling I was having. Josh being here every night just felt right and I think I know I want to be with him the rest of my life.

I wouldn't want it any other way or with any other person. Brendon said the same thing to me about Dallon before he switched schools. They're still doing great.

One thought led to the next and before I knew it I was entranced in them.

I wanted to be with Josh the rest of my life, but who knows how long that will be. I may be doing okay now, but who's to say I'll make it long enough to get married and enjoy the true meaning of love. So far Josh is the closest thing to experience that I've had for love.

I don't care how much longer I have left so long as I can be with Josh for as long as that is. I just wish it could spend a full life with him. What is a full life though? I guess the thing about life is that it could really end spontaneously, sick or not. So spending a full life to me would be doing the most you can with the time you have.

I don't want to waste a single moment.

"Tyler!" Josh said loudly causing me to jump and stare at him with wide eyes.

He chuckled, "Sorry. Didn't mean to scare you, but I was saying your name for like.. five minutes... Everything okay?" he asked.

"Oh, uh, yeah. Sorry. I was just... thinking." I replied with a sheepish smile. "Let's make today fun okay? Like really fun! I don't want to miss any part of life.. Take me somewhere.. that has like beautiful views and stuff. An amusement park or- I don't know.. Something!"

Josh frowned some. "What's gotten into you? You sure you're okay?" he asked and I nodded. "Well, uhm.. I don't want to risk taking you to an amusement park."

I frowned deeply, but he put a finger up, "But.. Have you ever been to the mountains here?"

I shook my head. "We have mountains here?"

"Yeah! They're pretty cool actually.. C'mon I'll show you." he got up from my bed and grabbed his car keys.

I got up and followed him down to his car and got in it. He put the car into drive and we began heading out. I kept mostly quiet because I was anxious to see this, but also still couldn't shake that feeling from earlier.

"Here." he passed me the aux chord. "It's kinda a drive so I'm making you the DJ." he said.

I nodded taking the  chord and plugged in my phone going through my songs before stopping on one.

"Can.. Can I play a song I wrote?"

"Of course! I'd love to hear it." He replied with a smile.

I nodded and hit play on the song. "It's called Taxi Cab.."

*Start song here*

As it played I sang along to it quietly and Josh would look over every once in a while and smile.

"You have a beautiful voice you know that right?"

I shook my head a bit. "You're the only one who I ever sang in front of."

"I'll have to tell you more often then, huh?" he said and I giggled a bit. "Well, Tyler Joseph, you have a beautiful voice."

"Thank you Joshua Dun." I said pausing. "For everything."

I could feel myself getting emotional when my voice cracked a bit. He leaned over and took my hand in his and I took a deep breath and released it.

"Don't be afraid.." I said quietly squeezing his hand.

I rested my head against the window still holding Josh's hand. After about thirty minutes of driving Josh shook my shoulder a bit.

"We're here." he told me and I nodded with a yawn getting out of the car and stretching.

"You ready?" he asked.

"Definitely." I replied.

He took my hand in his again and started on the trail going upwards.

"Just let me know if you need to break, okay?"

"Okay."

Then we continued up in silence. The trees were surrounding us and all you could hear was the nature. The birds, the wind, the small critters scattering around. I kept looking around in awe like a child filled with wonder and amazement.

A small wave of exhaustion hit me and I wanted to sit down, but for once.. I just wanted to make it to the top. Like any other kid my age could easily. So I pushed on.

After about an hour of walking, we made it to the top.

"Woah.." I said breathlessly. "It's beautiful up here!" I ran over to the cliff edge.

Josh walked over and stood beside me as I gazed on.

"Josh.. this is.. this is amazing.."

"It is, isn't it?" he took my hand in his.

"This is.. What I picture it to be." I stated.

"Picture what?" he asked looking to me.

"Heaven.. I imagine it to be beautiful like this. Like you."

Josh gave me a sad smile. "I'm sure it's even better."

"I hope so.." I said quietly.

We both looked back out in silence watching everything and nothing all at once.

"Sometimes we will die and sometimes we will fly away. Either way you're by my side until my dying days. And if I'm not there and I'm far away I'd say, 'Don't be afraid.' I say, 'Don't be afraid we're going home'..." I sang quietly under my breath.

Josh gave me a reassuring squeeze on the hand and kissed the top of my head. "Let's head back down, okay?"

"Okay."