holding on to you | j.w.d

28

lauren pov
and today was something I never thought would ever happen. I never thought of anything ever happening like this. I always thought we were so close and would never argue. If we did we would make up straight away. but I ruined it all.

me and mariyah.

she couldn't sleep all night. at breakfast she wasn't speaking. I knew something was up. I asked her what was wrong. she shrugged and played with her food. tyler asked as well. she still didn't reply.
josh suggested we leave her alone for now. so we did.

the entire day she wasn't being herself. she was scribbling in her drawing book. she wasn't doing her usual drawings. just scribbles. I was so confused. she was constantly snapping the rubber band on her wrist, curling up into tiny balls here and there. tyler stayed close to her and didn't force her to speak. I grew frustrated and impatient.

"god sake mariyah!" I exclaim, slamming my fork down at dinner. the other three jumped. "what the hell is wrong?" I ask, standing up. she looked at me with wide eyes. "you really piss me off when you act like this!" I say. "you act so sad and depressed and expect people to do everything for you and comfort you. the only thing you want is attention! well guess what! your stupid act needs to fucking stop!" I yell. I barely ever yell. "lauren that's enough!" josh says sternly, gesturing me to sit down. mariyah was silent.

"no josh it isn't! she needs to get into her head that she can't keep acting like this! it's so annoying! just get help of your that low! stop acting like you need so much!" mariyah got up and ran out the room. I threw my fork down and went to the garden.

and she was gone after that. I felt horrible but what has been said, has been said. what I said was wrong. I hadn't come in from the garden yet. Id been out here for two hours. my best friend ran away. and I knew what running away was. tears rolled down my cheeks. I curled into a ball and sobbed.

"hi" josh had come to check on me. he handed me a glass of lemonade. I put it beside me and cried into his arms.
"I can't believe I did that" I sobbed.
"what you did was wrong. but it's done now. okay? we're going to find mariyah and you both will make up" he says.
"how do you know we're going to find her?" I whisper, wiping my tears away.
"I know so" he assures me.

I tried to believe him but after a few days she wasn't here. I grew more and more guilty till I couldn't take it. "josh, tyler, I'm going to find my best friend. goodbye!" I say walking out the house one evening. "your what!?" josh exclaims as the door shut. it was getting dark but I had to. I walked round the city but nothing.

then I started to think, maybe she wasn't coming back.