The Quiet Voice | Complete

Chapter 19

The next few days were all a blur for Chelsea.

She spent half of her time praying and the other half crying. She couldn't believe how God could have let Jonathan do this to her. Why would he cheat on me? Why would he cheat with Mila of all people? Why did he marry me if he knew about Abigail? How long has this been going on? Since that day at university?...

Her memory flashed back to university days when she suspected their affair. Back to a time when Jonathan swore that he loved her and only her. Was he lying back then already? For how long had she been so blind? Knowing that he cheated was a terrible shock, but what was worse was knowing that he had cheated with her best friend. Someone that she loved and trusted. Someone she thought of as a sister-friend.

Did he ever love me? Chelsea wondered aloud.

Chelsea had given up so many things for Jonathan. Over the years she had always put his needs above hers. But what hurt her the most was the fact that Mila had given him the one thing that he wanted so badly and she couldn't give him. A child.

Chelsea prayed from when her eyes opened in the morning until they closed in the evening. She barely ate or slept. She even put in leave from work and focused on her quiet time with God. Praying that God would make Jonathan stay. Praying that Jonathan would find his way back to her. Praying that God would show Jonathan that she was the perfect woman for him. That God would show him that she was his soulmate.

Please God, don't let him leave me. Please draw him closer to You. Please make him stay. Remind him of all the amazing memories we've shared. Of our love and life that we share. He was my first love and I could never love someone as much as I do him. I beg you Lord, please make him stay. We can work through this. He can learn to love me again. I will forgive him for cheating and never make him feel guilty about it. I will even love Abigail as if she were my own. Please God. I beg You. Please don't take him from me.

Jonathan eventually contacted Chelsea about a week after his confession, asking if they could meet to chat about their future. Chelsea felt this was a good sign, even though her gut was telling her otherwise.

"So much has happened and I think that we need to meet to discuss the next steps to be taken," said Jonathan when he phoned to arrange their meeting, "things are really complicated and we need to both be on the same page."

"I agree," answered Chelsea, so much hope in her heart. "We can work through this Jonathan. We just need to both want it badly enough."

Chelsea went to the kitchen to make some tea after their phone call, a quiet calm had come over her, for she knew that God was in control.

She took her cup of tea and went to sit on the veranda to enjoy the late afternoon sun. That was her favourite time of the day, always had been.

It always made her think about all the beauty that God had created, seeing the sun set and watching the sky turn beautiful colours of pink and orange.

I know that You are in control God. Thank You for loving me as much as You do and for hearing my every prayer. I lay my marriage by Your feet and surrender to You. Do with it as You wish. Thy will be done.

Jonathan had asked if he could come over for dinner the following night, to discuss matters further, and Chelsea had already decided to make all his favourite dishes. She would give everything that she had.

The weather, the following day, was absolutely beautiful and Chelsea was in a great mood from the moment she opened her eyes.

She decided to set the table in the garden for dinner and had planned every detail and decoration. She lit candles in the garden and made the setting as romantic as possible. God was doing His bit and she was doing hers.

I'm giving it my all God... just as I promised.

The table was set with their best dinner set, beautiful flowers and the candle that they lit together at their wedding ceremony – their symbol of unity. She was determined to remind him of the love they share and the future that they had promised each other. Yes God, I'm pulling out all the stops!

Once the food and table were ready, the last detail was for Chelsea to get dressed. She had especially decided to wear the dress that Jonathan had bought for her on their honeymoon. It was a stunning floor-length sun dress. Mostly white with a delicate pattern of blue and pink flowers on the hemline. It had shoestring straps that criss-crossed over her back and a sweetheart neckline. When she wore it on their honeymoon, he told her that she looked so amazing in the dress that he could deny her nothing.

Everything was coming together nicely; their evening would be perfect. Her make-up was minimal but striking and she wore her hair in loose ringlets, exactly as Jonathan loved it. I will make you fall in love with me again. I won't give up on us without a fight!

She was so nervous when she heard the doorbell ring. She took one last look at the table, smiled to herself and went to open the door, stopping one last time to take a quick glance at herself in the passage mirror. You can do this! Here we go God.

Her heart skipped a beat as she opened the door. Jonathan looked as handsome as ever and she felt quite awkward welcoming him into the home that they share.

She thought to herself that he must have come straight from work because he was wearing a suit and still had his briefcase with him.

She showed him to the garden and offered him something to drink.

"Just water for me, thanks," was his short reply.

He was already seated at the table when she returned with their drinks.

"Thank you for agreeing to meet with me," said Jonathan as Chelsea sat down opposite him with her glass of ice tea, "I know that I've turned your entire world upside down with my news. Please believe me when I say that I never meant to hurt you."

He looked nervous and was fidgeting with his briefcase handle quite a bit, which made her feel uneasy.

Please God, keep me strong.

"I think that it's time that you and I chat about what's happened so that we can put it all behind us and start building up our marriage again," replied Chelsea, holding her glass in her hands, afraid that she too might start fidgeting.

Jonathan couldn't make eye contact with Chelsea, his eyes looking everywhere but at her.

"Is everything okay?" asked Chelsea, noticing how uncomfortable he was acting. "Have I said something wrong?"

"No, you've done everything right. You always have." Jonathan knew that it was best to get straight to the point. There was no use in wasting time on niceties and no easy way of doing what he had come there to do.

"I don't think that we're on the same page," admitted Jonathan eventually as he slowly shook his head and finally made eye contact with Chelsea, "I've come here for a reason."

"I know," smiled Chelsea with so much love in her eyes, "you've come for dinner so that we can sort the situation out and carry on with our lives."

"Yes and no," said Jonathan as he reached into his briefcase and took out an envelope. "I've actually come to see you to give you this." He gently slid the envelope over the table to Chelsea.

"What is this?" asked Chelsea as she felt her heart beat faster and her throat go dry. But there was no need for Jonathan to answer, because as she asked the question she opened the envelope and slid out the document inside.

One word caught her eye and she knew exactly why Jonathan had come to see her.

Please God, not this!

But it was too late. Jonathan wanted a divorce.

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God works in ways that don't always make sense to us, but He knows best and His timing is perfect. Is Chelsea's faith enough to let Jonathan go?

Please remember to comment and vote xoxo