Survivor

Chapter 40

Shepard
  I held my Omni-Tool in my hand, now in sleep mode but still connected to the apartment VI.
I took a deep breath to steady myself as I walked into the bedroom, only to find Garrus asleep.
I smiled at the view, my heart softening at the sight of the man I love asleep.
I then lowered the lights through the control next to the door and let the door shut behind me, wincing at the sound.
Garrus stirred at the sound and woke, sitting up while he rubbed his forehead,
"How long was I out?"
I shrugged. "I don't know, I was on the call for an hour and a half though."
Garrus grunted. "What was that about?"
I sighed. "It was Hackett. He wants to talk to me about possibly continuing my service in the Alliance Navy. They're not going to force my hand but he told me they need capable bodies and soldiers right now. As an N7 and Spectre, that's exactly what I am."
The displeasure was clear on Garrus' face and his mandibles worked as he processed his irritation at the news.
"What did you tell him?"
"I told him I would meet him in an hour. I need to know what you think of this."
He blew out a breath and stood to pace a few steps, then turned back to face me. "We both knew this was coming. The Alliance Navy isn't about to let their biggest asset go so easily."
He watched me for a moment before he shook his head and sighed. "I'm not going to stop you if this is what you want, Samantha. Just know that I have your back whichever way you decide to go."
I nodded and chewed on my lip. "Your preference, though?"
Garrus chuckled. "My preference would be to have you on a tropical island sipping martinis with everything dangerous around you eliminated, including the little things like thorns and splinters."
I smiled. "I should have known that would be your answer."
"After all the trouble you've gotten into and all the injuries you've faced, you shouldn't be surprised..." He trailed off, his face almost haunted.
  I walked to him, my footsteps silent in the carpet until I stopped in front of him and wrapped my arms around his neck. I stood on my toes as he bent down to meet me and I pressed a tender kiss to his lips. "I'll be okay, Garrus. Don't worry."
  Garrus nodded and pressed his forehead to mine. "I can't help it. I just can't lose you again."
  "You won't," I whispered.
  I kissed him one more time before I backed away. "I've got to get going. We're meeting at the Presidium Commons. I'll be back afterwards okay? Don't jump the gun and quit anything in C-Sec- and don't lie to me by telling me you aren't going to give it up again. I want you to stay there. It's a good position."
  Garrus sighed. "Okay... Just... Let me know how it goes?"
  I smiled. "You know I will."
  I replaced my Omni-Tool on my wrist as I turned and walked out of the room, glancing back at Garrus as I walked to see him standing where I left him.
  My heart ached at the sight, but I knew what I had to do. I couldn't give up on humanity when my military needed me so much.
  I grabbed my N7 sweater as I passed it laying over the back of the couch and I left the apartment, the VI announcing my departure.
  I stepped into the elevator, which hummed to life when I typed in the floor I needed and the request for it to call a Skycar.
  The feeling of the elevator moving me down was strangely comforting, even though it had seemed like so long since I had been active.
  It was a reminder of my time in the military, knowing what I was doing at all times and knowing I was capable of doing what I had to. Even if it meant giving my life.
  It was never an easy task to serve in the Alliance Navy, but it was a welcome challenge when I knew it would be helping the civilians who didn't have the training I did.
  The elevator reached the ground floor, jostling me out of my thoughts and I stepped out into the lobby of the apartments and walked through it toward the Skycar I knew would be waiting in front of the door.
  Sure enough, a red Skycar sat with the engines idling and the nav computer awaiting instruction.
  I climbed in and set the nav point for the Commons, then sat back and watched the car pilot its way through traffic toward the destination.
  In the back of my mind I wondered if I was really ready for this, to go back into active duty. Physically, I had some work to do, but I was sure I could get back into shape fairly easily.
  Mental health was another issue in itself. I knew I could pull it together in the field, but there was no denying that I already struggled with nightmares.
  I had been able to say quiet when I stirred in the beginning, but it was starting to worry me that I would wake Garrus if they got any worse.
  The Skycar landed and I payed with my credit chit before I got out and walked through the crowd to try to find Hackett.
  It didn't take long for my eyes to land on him sitting at one of the lower tables in the café, far away from the crowd and close to the view of the Presidium.
It didn't surprise me that the table was his choice, and the distant nature of it from the bustling life of the Commons made it a comforting choice for me as well.
I took long strides to the table until I was pulling out an empty chair and seating myself across from Hackett.
He nodded in acknowledgment as he watched me sit and get settled.
"I'm glad you came, Shepard. I know I told you when we were talking already that this is in no way is entitling you to come back to the Alliance Navy. It's just a request, but I have to make sure you understand that."
I nodded. "Yes sir, I understand that."
Hackett nodded. "Good. If you so choose to not reenlist this afternoon, I'll have the forms sent in that state that you're being honorably discharged. I'll warn you that more than likely they'll turn it into a ceremony, as we all agree that you deserve every bit of respect after what you did for us. You still hold the title of Commander."
"I appreciate that, sir."
"And we all appreciate what you did for us. Which is why it's an open decision. The whole board agreed to end your contract the moment you said so if that were to be your decision. No penalty against you, and as I said, honorable discharge."
I chuckled. "Sounds a lot like you're pushing to get rid of me now, sir."
To my surprise, Hackett sighed and rubbed his face before he looked back up at me. "I'll be honest here, Shepard. While there's not extinction hanging over our heads, there's a lot to do and a lot more crime than we're letting on. Morale is at a low on Earth with how slow some repairs are going, and then there's the rogues that keep progress at a minimum in some places. We really do need experienced individuals that can command and hold the respect of their team. There's people like that I've talked to, but your name never slipped my mind. You managed to hold onto alien loyalty and that's a hard enough thing to accomplish. Your record holds its own kind of authority, also. We can benefit you with a pay raise more than a normal soldier would see, and we have a schedule set we think is generous, all things considered."
I sat back in my seat, taking it all in. "Rogues? Are you saying that there's mutiny spreading over Earth after all that's just happened?"
Hackett nodded, his face grim. "Those that disagree with the alien races settling on Earth and humans allying themselves with aliens have thought now is a good time to rise against this. Especially considering alien populations are at an all time high on Earth right now. There's been too many blows to the alien population. It doesn't look good on humanity or the Alliance."
I nodded. "I can see why. The other races came to help us defeat the Reapers and are still here helping with repairs and here are some rogues killing off the help. It's ungrateful and it looks bad that the Alliance is stretched too thin to be able to protect them."
I thought for a moment as Hackett watched me in silence.
"What is the schedule like," I asked Hackett.
"Ten days on deployment counting travel, seven days leave. It's a ten on seven off schedule. Much better than anyone else has had."
My eyebrows shot up in shock. "Really? That grateful?"
"That desperate," Hackett corrected, his grim tone emphasizing his view on this.
I sighed and rubbed my face.
It was hard to think of turning them down, after all the work that had been put into building alliances with the other races and earning trust and respect. Just to let it die with the people we couldn't protect.
It was also hard to stop and think of myself after having no hope of coming home.
I chewed my lip, thinking of Garrus and his reluctance to let me go.
I knew it was going to be hard on him after having taken care of me while I was blind and needed him more than ever.
I also knew I was going to drive myself and him crazy when it sunk in that I was retired from the military.
I let out one more sigh before I looked up at Hackett, my eyes meeting his. "I'll reenlist. I need to sign the forms today, though. I'll also need two days before I can deploy, minimum."
Hackett nodded. "Reasonable requests. Any other requests?"
I bit my lip. "Yes, I'll need those benefit forms I turned down when I first enlisted. I now have beneficiaries I need to ensure get what I have if something happens. I can't make the mistake of leaving those loose ends if something happens. I made the mistake twice, it can't happen again."
Hackett nodded. "Alright, I'll send everything over to your Omni-Tool. Are you sure you want to go through with this? I won't hold it over you if you back out now."
I shook my head and held his gaze with my own determined one. "I'm sure."

((A/N: Okay, let's be honest here, it would be unbelievable if Shepard managed to retire without a second thought... Or a third, fourth, and fifth.
I sure hope she knows what she's doing... ;) lol
Thanks for reading, guys! I truly love to see that people are reading this fanfic! If you like it, maybe just let me know by leaving a vote, and let me know what you think with a comment?
Thank you!!! Keelah Se'lai!))