Aberration

Chapter 35

-Important author's note at the end of chapter-

I visit Harry often within the next two days. It had been 3 nights ago I heard Harry in a battle with himself late that night, and it's now Tuesday. Despite my soft yet persistent efforts to get close to Harry, he doesn't give me much to work with. I've somehow managed to get him to start taking his medications again but that's about it. Every night when I'd go to see him, I'd take a seat on his bed and he always managed to keep his distance and sit at the desk across the room. Ignoring this, I would continue on with casual conversation, though he'd never actually respond. Every unfinished sentence I made while waiting for his response that never came broke down my hopes again and again. I'd somehow managed to get them up again by the next night, but they'd be broken once more when the same silent action repeats.

It's now about three in the afternoon on Tuesday and I sit on the floor of the theater room in front of Harry's spot on the couch. Everyone else was outside on the patio barbecuing, and knowing Harry's dislike for crowds I knew he'd end up somewhere secluded inside. And this is where I found him.

"Are you hungry?" I asked softly, trying to meet his gaze that stared at the blank tv screen in front of him. His lack of a response wasn't a surprise but it still hurt inside. 

I watched as he continuously pulled his fingers into his palm then released them back out shakily. Something I had grown used to see him doing in this short amount of time. I took a breath and stood to my feet, brushing off my jeans.

"Well I am, so I'll be right back."

I shook my head in defeat once again as I walked down the hallway and out the back door. He made me so frustrated. I want to help him. I know it may not seem like it from his perspective, and I understand if he views my sudden appearances as odd or unusual but I'm doing what it takes. Giving up wasn't an option and if I wanted to get somewhere and make progress I had to be persistent with him. I have to make alone time with him an everyday thing. And so far, it has been. Usually I was with him multiple times a day. I just hoped I could keep this up before all my energy runs out.

"Ready for a burger?" Liam smiled, flipping over multiple patties that sat sizzling on the grill. It smelt heavenly out here and I nodded my head eagerly. "They're about done, just give it a minute."

I made my way over to where everyone  else sat, around the large patio table that could seat about fifteen. Slumping down in the chair next to Lauren, I held my head in my hands. My small headache had turned into a migraine and I was about ready to overdose on pain relievers. 

"You okay?" Lauren asked, nudging me with her shoulder.

"Yeah, just a headache." I forced a smile. It wasn't "just a headache". It felt as if a bomb was going off inside my head. Over and over and over.

"Well I hope it's just a headache, don't you have practice tonight?"

Crap. I groaned into my hands at the thought of having Cheer practice while feeling like this. I couldn't skip either. We hadn't had practice for almost a week and I know if I missed it tonight, I would be paying for it later in bur-pees and extra laps. I checked the time on my phone. 3:25 p.m. Practice starts at 5 and I'm sure it'll be extra long to make up for missed time. The more I thought about it, the more I was grateful that this was my last eligible year to cheer with Cheer Athletics. Their max age limit was 18 or still in High School, and since I was turning 18 in just a few months and that I was now a senior, I would be saying bye to Cheer for a while. At least until college if I tried out for the team.

"Food's ready." Liam rang out.

I quickly got up, piling my plate high with a Burger, fries, and potato salad. I was going to be regretting eating this much at practice later but right now, I was so hungry I could care less. Grabbing a fork and napkin, I shuffled back inside, closing the sliding glass door behind me. I walked back into the theater room, peeking over the couch as I moved to catch a glimpse of Harry sitting in the exact same position I left him. I retook my spot on the floor by his feet, and placed my plate of food on my lap.