Just Some Shit I'll Write.

Not doing too well...

Hey guys...

It's me...

As you know

I procrastinated on doing work

And I'm a long ways behind with four days to finish school

And I read an article on procrastinating

And what it said was all to true to me.

It causes guilt. It hurts you and others. It makes you depressed.

And that's the thing

I thought that I've been happy

Making new friends

Getting into a relationship

Reaching a month with her

But

I know this sounds emo as all fuck

And

I don't mean it to

But I'm feeling this depression

This worry

This pain and guilt

For failing myself

For failing others

I just want to run away

Take what I need and go

My parents "would care about me"

It's one less mouth to feed

Less money to spend

Less time taken up

More time for them to be happy

Without the burden of me holding them back

If I don't pass this grade

I don't know how I could live with myself

My father wants me to succeed

And I fail him

Time

After

Time

After

Time

Wasting his money on lawyers for me

Because I screwed up

I failed him

Like I always do

I love my dad

I hate disappointing him

But I do

And I try

God I try

But I always

Always

Fail

I'm only good at things that aren't useful.

All I'm good at is video games

And maybe helping others when they're feeling down like this

But that doesn't matter

All that matters is that I get good grades

Don't get in trouble

Don't be a failure

But guess what?

I have terrible grades

I got expelled from school

I'm in trouble with the law

I am a failure

I want this pain and suffering to end

Please....

God please....

Somebody hear me

Help me

At least try to