Solace

Chapter 7- Dangerous

It was a no-sun Sunday morning.

"We've mended his broken ribs, stopped the bleeding and we've stitched him up, now we'll see if he wakes up."

"Is that a good news?" I asked.

"Hope so. You can see him if you want to but I'll warn you that it isn't-"

"No, I wanna see."
Aerrin grabbed my hand to stop me. "Why? You can see him when he gets better. Don't do this to yourself."

"Aerrin I know you're worried that it'll hurt me to see him like that but remember, I'm a medical student. I literally signed up to see sights like that, all my life." I took a deep breathe and Aerrin helped me inside the room.

Few minutes later, I got into his car, sobbing.

"Why are you crying now?" Aerrin asked, clearly annoyed.

"Because I hate people who do this. I hate unkind and heartless people. I hate this world!" I whispered.

"You know, you shouldn't hate the world. It's beautiful." I began to protest but he kept on speaking  "What makes it beautiful, you ask? You and every other person who's kind and compassionate. There's a beautiful balance of light and dark, evil and good. Don't think about anything else." He finished and started the car.

I looked at him in disbelief," you think I'm kind? You think I'm goo-"

"Yes you're and there's nothing that can cha-"

"I KILLED MY BROTHER! I BURNED MY HOUSE! DAD LEFT BECAUSE OF ME! MY MOM WENT NUTS BEC -"

"STOP FIA STOP! IT WASN'T YOUR FAULT SO CALM DOWN ......oh my GOD BREATHE FIA! FUCKING BREATHE!"

I don't remember what happened. I think I passed out.

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"She still blames herself. She's in pain." Someone whispered. Aerrin

"She's his victim too. She's been hurting all her life. But she's fighting. She deserves the truth Aerrin, we should tell h-"

"Don't uncle!" the door opened. I kept as still as a dead fish. The door closed.
"It's too dangerous. Better hurt than killed."

What's dangerous? What are they talking about?

A sick feeling rose inside my stomach.
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"Uncle Abrahim can I go see my mom."

"Today? Sure, do you want me take you?

"If you're free."

"Okay Sof."

Few hours later, I came home physically and emotionally exhausted. Mom was worse. Uncle Abrahim said she's going to get better. But I knew she wasn't. She kept on calling for Azmir and my father. Even on sedatives. She was pale and her veins were visible under her skin.

These 3 days were the worst. Just too much. I refrained from any self destructive thoughts and the conversation between Aerrin and uncle. I just concentrated on going to college tomorrow. Atleast it would be boring and monotonous. I could just relax with my friends. 

I packed my stuff. And uncle's driver dropped me off to my home, along with Amber. Good. I didn't want to be alone. She helped me out of the car. Now, I did not need any help. My leg was good. I was a quick healer (just physically). But I let her.

In the morning, it started raining. And it was cold. I threw on a black knee length coat with a fitted jeans and leather ankle boots. I wasn't walking to the bus today. I was taking the car I hated. And I only took it out when there was nothing else I could do. Dad sent it to me on my 17th birthday, that is why I hated it the most.  He doesn't need to send me birthday gifts. But sometimes, I needed a car of my own.

It was a honda crz. He knew what I needed. Yet he never came to see me. 12 years now.

I drove to the college listening to Bastille's laughter lines and then to requiem for blue jeans. On repeat. It was raining heavily now. But I wasn't in any hurry. My cellphone buzzed a few times but I ignored it. I let myself breath deeply. It felt so nice. I almost changed my mind, to not go to the college and just wander around all day.  But then I saw the college building and the moment broke.

I parked and went straight to the class. I was 15 minutes late but doctor Khalida didn't care. Myra's face lit up when she saw me coming. Oh how much I loved her. She patted excitedly on the seat next to hers. I sat and side hugged her.

"I'm so sorry I hid it from you this long." She whispered.

"What?" I asked looking at her.

"I'm seeing this... this guy."

"Oh my god! Whooo?" I asked, genuinely curious.

"He's from our class."

"Cut the suspense you idiot. Who? And does leena know?"

"Yeah, she knows. Rayhan." He was this tall guy with curly hair. And he had the most amazing smile I've ever seen on a guy. Yeah he's cute.

"Oooohh. When did this happen? You took down one of the hottest guy in our college." She laughed.

"He sent me a request on facebook few weeks ago. I accepted. After that we started texting. And we texted all night. He asked me out three days ago,  I said yes!" She gave me a big smile.

"Lucky bitch." I chuckled and looked over at him. He was sitting on the other side of our humongous lecture hall, taking notes.

"He's so cute." I said.
Then, I noticed his friend sitting beside him. He had his glasses on. And his hair were a mess around his face. He wasn't taking any notes. Just listening.

"Are you checking Em out?" I looked at Myra, startled. "Yeah you totally were Sof, don't even deny." She wiggled her eyebrow. I blushed.

"I wasn't checking him out. I was JUST looking at your new boyfriend's friends."

"Just looking? You were practically drooling over him." She whispered

"No I wasn't. Don't exaggerate. And since when do you call Emerens 'Em'?"

"He's Rayhan's close friend. I know a lot about him. If you wanna know, first you have to admit that you're crushing on him."

"No, I'm not. Now let me study." She shrugged and hid her smile.

After two hours, we all went to cafeteria. It was still raining a lot.
We ordered some mayo fries and chow mein. We were eating when Rayhan came to our table.

"Myra can we talk?",everyone looked at her. She nodded and got up.
"I'll see you in class". She said to us. I smiled and nodded.

I looked at Emerens who was standing with his friends, waiting for Rayhan. His eyes met mine. My heart skipped a beat. I thought he would say hi or smile but he made a face like he'd eaten a lemon and averted his gaze. Okay. What? Did he just... do that? Weirdo.

My knee pained a little, but rest of the day went well.

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