Teenage Life (& Lies)

Chapter 9

The next day starts off normally. Well at least normal to me, except I know at school, our class has to present our book-in-the-bags. See over the summer vacation, as homework, we each were supposed to read three books. For two of them, you do a report with the guideline the teachers give you. The last book, you do a book-in-the-bag. Well mine, this year was about the book Nipper . Its about this boy and stuff, but the book is besides the fact. What's important now is that I have to present in front of the class. Which to me is the most horrible thing in the world. It's absolutely SCARY. I know there are other more frightening things in the world but talking to people in front of PEOPLE is just, I don't know, just so freaking scary to me!!! Anyway, so I'm on the bus to school, listening to my MP3, and wondering if I'll do any good.

I wish silently that the bus will never reach the school and that I never have to present. I have a bad case of stage fright, but if you were to look at my history, you'll be saying why the hell is she so scared? I mean I've done choir for four years, did piano recitals for three years, and this years I had to do orals, which were saying memorized poems to the class. And those poems weren't short! On top of that, we are graded on how we do. And yet I'm doing great! It's just I get so nervous in front of people, I either blank out or play with my fingers, or just say whatever I need to say and get it over with. I look out the window and sigh. I honestly don't know why I'm just sitting listening to music.

I look over to Michelle, my friend who is in the other class, sadly. She has nothing to worry about. I mean I got all the social problems. What does she have to worry about? What her nails being uneven or her hair all messed up? Like really? I don't have my nails painted and I almost never to my hair, and yet I have a boyfriend! I mean how in the hell is that possible? The ugliest girl have a boyfriend yet the pretty and beautiful girls have none. I sigh and shake my head. Life is just so confusing and frustrating, I add with a chuckle.

The bus halts to the stop and I look out the window to see Christopher walking across the street to the school. I try to wave to him, but he doesn't see me. Oh well. I walk down the isle of the bus, out the door, and into the school building. I walk through the classroom door to remember I'm sitting with Dominic. I look into the walk in closet to see a whole pack of people putting away their bags. I see Dominic in the corner first, not only because he is really tall, but because he just seems to grab my attention. I decide to put away my bag later and walk over to my desk to put away my things. I realize that my desk has a hole, right smack in the middle.

Okay, it's not the most amazing thing in the world and it's not like I didn't notice or know this. I've known it for a while, heck I even joked around with Dominic yesterday about it, but today the hole seems to intrigue me like an elaborate distraction. I see Dominic walking over to his desk, which is right in front of mine. Instead of just staring at him, I sit down and say hi to Benjamin. Ben is a nice boy. I've known him since second grade back when my school was open. I remember when he first came. I smile as I remember the day he said all girls were turkeys and then he said that his mom wasn't one. Then the memory of him asking to marry me in second grade at a mass. I was surprised. He was so cute back then. Well I guess I was real slow about the whole thing and changed his mind about it. I wasn't sad at all but kind of disappointed back then.

Today Ben still is kind of cute but he's just a friend and I don't like him like that anyway. He's not even my type I guess. He is sort of smart, but it's kind of hard dating a guy that is less smart than you. I look at Alexandra's Book-in-the-bag and compliment it. I ask her what it's all about and she gives a brief description. I reply with a “Cool. Maybe I'll read it sometime.” I then realize that Christopher isn't sitting yet. 'Maybe he's in the closet', I think. I shrug before getting up.

I walk to the closet where I see Christopher. I hand up my bag and say hi. He replies and for some reason we just smile dumbly at each other. The bell rings and we both go into the classroom to our desks and sit. The announcements go on and I look across at Dominic and we smile. I open my desk and take out a pencil. I stick my pencil into the hole of the desk and play with it. Dominic sees and he laughs. I laugh yet I feel like I'm blushing in front of him. I have no clue what is wrong with me today. Then I randomly remember something about Dominic having a hate list. I decide to ask him about it. I don't want to be on a hate list with some guy I barely know. “Dominic?”, I ask.