《Recovered Times》Kim Samuel [COMPLETED]

Chapter 1.5

I looked at my phone screen, staring at his name. I did it. I talked to Kim Samuel. After all these years of silence and all these years of just wanting to see his name appear on my notifications, I did it. I texted him.

Although, I should've seen his response coming. I was so stupid to think that we could start over, that everything would be the same.

This was all my fault... no, it was my mom's. This wasn't my fault at all. It couldn't be. I didn't ask for this. It's not my fault... it's not, right?

I groaned and buried my head in my hands, having the strange, overwhelming urge to throw my phone on the ground. I felt tears slowly forming in my dark brown eyes, a splitting image of his.

I envisioned his eyes in my head, or at least how I remembered them. It was true that it had been a while. His eyes looked at me with affection and kindness. His eyes made me smile whenever I stared into them. They made me happy.

He made me happy.

I felt the tears spill down my face.

I didn't care if we couldn't get back to where we were. As painful as it would be, I'd respect his decision if he chose not to talk to me ever again and block my number. The timing couldn't have been worse since he just became a K-Pop idol, making it seem like I want to use him for the fame.

But no, I just wanted him to forgive me. I needed him to know that I was sorry. That I felt terrible. That I wanted to just jump off a bridge when I saw him at the airport. That I wanted to jump off that stupid flight I took and just, well, die.

I wanted Samuel to forgive me... no... I needed Samuel to forgive me. But in order for that to happen, I'd need to stop being in denial. I need to accept it.

This is all my fault.