A Struggle With Love

scots and aussies

Jon's head was buzzing, despite the hangover he was running around trying to organise everything for Russell's return. He'd called the hotel and got himself another keycard for the room, apologising for throwing the other one into a canal. 

Jon was pacing back and forth whilst they were waiting for the bus, driving Adam and Frankie mad.

"Will you fucking stop that mate?" Scolded Frankie.

"Will you stop being a dick?" Replied Jon, proud of his answer.

"No." Frankie looked down on him with his arms crossed. "I'll stop being a dick when people start saying that your jokes are funny." He laughed and ruffled Jon's hair, like he was a little kid. Jon stepped away, knowing Frankie did it to annoy him.

Adam laughed at them, just thankful that Jon had stopped pacing back and forth. He knew that Jon's rented car contract had finished and he had to sit on a bus, which with severe OCD is not easy, but he couldn't help but think that Jon was worried about something else but he wouldn't talk about it, it was strange.

Five minutes later the bus arrived and the journey seemed like forever, however fast the streets seemed to go by, the further Jon felt from Russell.

Frankie smiled and nudged Adam, he showed him a message from Hugh.

"Fuck it, I'm taking a break, I miss you. I'll be in Guernsey tomorrow morning, maybe we can meet everyone for a drink. Maybe I can talk to Adam about something too."

Frankie looked at Jon, noticing his longing look out of the window, and then looked back at Adam concerned. Adam just shrugged and tried to change the mood.

"So, how long have you known Hugh?" He asked.

"Shit, about 15 years now."

"15?" Said Adam, shocked at how long they'd known each other.

Frankie used to write shows for the BBC with Hugh. He was quite different then to how he appears on Mock The Week now, he was more weird and crazy, like in the old days when he was working with Steve Punt, who obviously changed him quite a bit when all the drama started. Frankie often missed the old Hugh, the one that would go into sudden, random outbursts in the middle of writing. He remembered the day they first met, Frankie held his hand out for Hugh to shake but Hugh just hugged him, it was a friendly hug at the time but as they went on the hugs got more and more close and warm until Hugh finally plucked up the courage to tell Frankie how he felt, the day Frankie left MTW. Frankie remembered being completely starstruck when he walked into the room and realised he wasn't dreaming, he was going to be working with one of his comedy heroes and he just couldn't believe it. He still can't believe Hugh even wanted to talk to him after they'd finished writing, let alone begging them to let him on Mock The Week. Frankie loved Hugh's attention on Mock The Week but something didn't feel right, he felt restricted and, although he thinks it sounds petty, it made him depressed and the only person that seemed to accept that was Hugh. Hugh always accepted however Frankie felt and tried to console him in whatever way he could. Frankie wasn't so good at handling his or others emotions. He didn't seem to care about what he said or how it made someone feel, people thought that was displayed in his jokes. It wasn't. He was trying to raise attention to things he felt were problems, like when he was taken to court for a joke. 

Before Frankie had finished the bus stopped near the Psychiatric Hospital and they all ran in. Jon's heart was racing, he hoped to God that Russell was okay and he hoped Russell still loved him, they hadn't seen each other properly for a while and what if it was different? What if he hated him for letting them keep him there? 

Those thoughts changed when he saw Russell's face. The way his eyes widened with sheer joy, the way a grin smeared across his face as soon as they walked through the double doors. Jon laughed as Russell picked him up and kissed him, God, how they both missed that. They signed form upon form.

"I'm sorry for leaving you here."

"You didn't leave me here."

"But-"

"No, I needed this. Imagine how shit I would've been if I hadn't had the tests, if you hadn't have told me to do it. I did it for you, Jon."

Adam tapped Russell on the shoulder and asked to talk. He told Russell about how they found Jon yesterday. Drunk, alone and scared in the middle of the night. How they'd both had to drag him back to Frankie's place. Russell decided to talk to Jon the next day because right now, he just loved seeing Jon smile. He didn't want any drama, it was 9 o'clock in the morning.