Johnny x Ash

My Story

"My biological mother was never into religion. But, she was a selective Christian. She would hate on anyone that "went against" God. When she was doing the one big thing against the Bible. She was showing hate to her own family and children, rather than loving everyone. When I told her that, she would just yell at me more than usual.

She was against everything "gay." Rather than following what the Bible said about love, she would hate. So much. She said that science was stupid, and that it was poisoning the brains of our children. She didn't want anyone gay near her, or in her house. She would say that all gays are going to Hell.

And when I told her that I am bisexual, she didn't hear bisexual. She heard,"I hate you so I choose to be gay." She thought I was going to poison her or something stupid like that. Which is the main reason she kicked me out. With no food, no water, or any supplies.

I don't remember my biological father that well. I just remember that he and my mother would always be yelling and fighting. I like to believe he tried to tell my mother that "gays" aren't evil. He committed suicide when I was three. Leaving me and my older brother alone to my mother. My mother said that my father was going to Hell for killing one of God's children... and for being a terrible person in general.

I don't remember my brother's name, or what he really looked like. I don't even know if he's alive anymore. I just remember that he would sing "How to Save a Life" to me, when our mother was angry or something. That's why that song is important to me. I remember the night he left. He and my mother were yelling. I think that the neighbors were able to hear them. He came to hug me and said he was going on a walk. I said I wanted to go with him, but he said he needed to be alone. It was enough for my four year old brain. I thought he was coming back. But no, he went out for a walk and never came back.

When I asked my mother when he was coming back she simply said,"He's burning in Hell." I remember those words coming out of her mouth so clearly. And now that I think of it, I think he might have been part of the LGBTQ+ community. I remember one of his friends coming over often. And I remember the way he looked at his friend. At the time, I thought that's how you looked at friends. Because I wouldn't know, I didn't have any.

It was my tenth birthday when my mother kicked me out. I told her I had something special to tell her. Because I thought I was ready to finally tell someone. You know, come out of the closet. She told me, that because of my age, I was ready to start going to a Pride festival. But not to be part of it, to be on the side and yell how all of them are going to Hell. I just blurted it out, "I'm bisexual." I was hoping that my mother would at least accept me. But no, she didn't. She told me that since I was the last person in her household, she would get help to cleanse me. I told her that I can't be cleansed. That I am who I am. But no, she ended up yelling at me. Then pushing me out the door, to fend for myself on the streets.

But that's when Rosita found me. And brought me to you. Who accept me for who I am. And I finally have the family that I needed, rather than someone who hates me."

"Woah. You didn't have to tell us this you know."

"No. It's about time you guys know how much you really mean to me. That you know what I've been through. I need to be able to tell my story so that it lives on."

"Well I'm glad you were able to tell us. I love you."

"I love you too."

"Thank for being the best parents I could have."

End