Rebel: A Monstercat Fanfic

083 - Beginnings (Epilogue)

Song of the Chapter: Before We Fade - Tristam (Electronic)
Cataclysm - Rogue ft. Meg Dean (Glitch Hop)

(Monstercat's POV)

I guess this is it, then.

This is the end. We made it.

Well ... most of us.

It's been three weeks since Nick's death. None of us are the same. How could we be? He was the one who started this. He was the one who finished it.

At least ... at least he got his final wish. He died in his best friend's arms, safe and warm and loved, with a smile on his face.

It's hit Eoin the hardest, of course. That same day, we went to the MI to discuss the ending of Jensen's reign of terror, and he mysteriously vanished - he and Braken. Turns out, Braken had found him on the Vancouver bridge, ready to jump off. He didn't think it was worth it anymore. Braken convinced him to stay. He was the perfect person to talk to him, as he'd tried to kill himself, too, once. The rest of us tried to help them both the best we could, but nothing we could ever do would bring Nick back, and nothing we'd ever do would replace him.

Finishing a revolution might be harder than starting one. Suddenly, things like insomnia and PTSD are very real conditions. You miss your old self, the person who didn't jump at every footstep. But most of all, you miss your friends. X and his pack of experiments vanished into the forest, but they're not gone. We could see them again. But Nick and all the other dead artists ... they're gone forever.

I've never seen as much crying at a funeral than I did at Nick's. We had the responsibility to find his sister and tell her that her only family was dead. She came to the funeral, and of course she was devastated, but even she didn't cry as much as Eoin. He stood there in front of the casket and sobbed and sobbed. No one had the heart to tell him to leave. I came up to him to see if I could do anything, and I realized he was singing softly, choking out the words through his tears.

"So tell me we can save this.
Where's my happy ending?
Can't go on pretending
Anymore.

You always said that love takes work.
It's been a bumpy ride.
I know how hard you've tried,
But holding on just makes it worse.
It's best to walk away.
It's our time to say goodbye."

Things will get better. I'm sure of it. Now that we have our freedom back, mostly. We're still working out the details. Most of us are going through some sort of therapy or counseling to help recover from this mess, and I believe that we'll all be okay. We'll be scarred, we'll have wounds, but in time, we'll get through it. I know this. I've seen it before. These are some of the strongest people I've ever met. I know we'll be okay.

Where's my happy ending?

I'm not sure, really. I don't know what's going to happen to me. I think I'll be better than some of the others.

Braken determined that he was leaving in a couple months, to find himself, he said, because he was afraid he'd hurt one of us again, even though he hasn't heard F2-06's influence at all since that day he attacked Aero. He wants to make sure it's really gone. He's grown up a lot since we first met him. Leo is dreading the day he leaves, but now that they're together again and cherishing every moment, I know he knows that it'll be okay. They'll see each other again. Joel and Evee are happy together, relieved that everything worked out. Austin is alive and going in for surgery in three days, to fix something that got damaged when he was shot. Alex is doing considerably better than I thought he would be. He's like Braken's second adopted older brother, Leo being the first, of course. Nitro Fun - Gus is doing a lot better, since he's been treated for his PTSD and insomnia. He's getting back up there on the emotional scale and becoming a lot happier. Ben is getting along with us very well, and he just got out of the hospital, where they fixed his shoulder. He fits right in with us, and even though we haven't known him for very long, he's already part of the family.

The only one who's not getting better is Eoin. He won't talk to us hardly at all, and if he does, it's to yell and get angry. "It's not fair!" he'll scream. "How come everyone else is okay? How come Leo got Braken back and Evee kept Joel? How come I couldn't keep Nick?"

I don't know. Life doesn't pick and choose. It just happens.

Someone's always close to him to make sure he doesn't try to harm himself in anyway again. But in time ... I believe that he, too, will be okay.

"I'll always be there with you."

I don't know why any of this had to happen. I just know that it did. I know that this isn't the end, not really. Sure, it's the end of an amazing adventure, full of beautiful friendships, breathtaking terrors, and heartbreaking losses, a story that's told through many points of view, many styles and many voices. But this isn't the end. It might be over now, but we're not finished. We're still here.

This is just a new beginning. The start of a new story. And though I'd love to tell it to you, I think that it's more personal this time. A personal journey.

I guess this is it, then.

It's time to say goodbye.