Chapter 1

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"Are you sure you're okay? I'm not going too hard, am I?" Scott asked, peering down at my nakedness. "N-no, it's fine, h-honestly..." I lied. Scott must have understood my lack-of-truth-yness because he slowed down and thrusted gently. I did love Scott. Will all of my heart. But sometimes.. He did scare me. And I know that sounds weird but, I was always scared that he'd change while we were in bed or something and he might hurt me or hurt himself. That sounds really selfish, I know, but I'd been in that position before, and it's not one I want to go back in. Maybe if I was.. Like Scott, I'd be able to handle everything. I was breaking and I needed some moral strength... And physical strength. Everything began to feel more comfortable, again, so he picked up the pace. As I lay there, the love of my life pinned on top of me, I felt alive. The past week had been utter chaos. Basically an average week at Beacon Hills, but somehow, this week seemed to be the cherry on the cake. All I seemed to be surrounded by were Werewolves. All the conversations were about Werewolves. And everyone we were saving happened to be, guess what, Werewolves. Ever since all of this began, I had thought about Scott changing me. But this week, those thoughts and feelings were amped up to around 100. Lately, all me and Scott did was argue. And in every argument, he would always say "You don't understand what it feels like!" and, well, that's a given; I obviously don't know what it feels like for him. But I do try, I really do. It makes me feel so crappy, knowing he's going through stuff and all I can do is kiss him and reassure him. But he didn't need reassuring, he needed someone who understood him. I wanted to be that person. Little ironic if the huntsman's daughter ended up being the hunter's object, but, it was something I had wanted. Something I'd thought through, a lot. I clutched onto Scott's chest as he began to thrust, harder and faster. We were both on the verge of climaxing. "Oh.. Ooh," He moaned with every thrust. I dug my nails deeper into his chest as he pushed one more time before falling to my side. We both lay there in my now sweat-covered bed, red and panting. "W-wow.." We both said in unison. He laughed. I smiled and turned to face him. But the subject of my going she-wolf still lingered in my head. Scott was such a sweetheart, thought. I did love him. Not just puppy-love, this was actual love. We had something indescribable. It was beautiful. But he also seemed to understand when I was and wasn't happy, e.g., right now. "Allison, what's wrong?" There was a sense of comfort and alarm in his voice. "N-nothing." I said, avoiding his eyes. He held onto my hand and raised my chin up so that I would look at him, "Allison, what's wrong?" He looked so cute when he was worried. God, snap out of it Allison. I thought to myself. If I told him the truth, he'd be pissed and worried, but if I lied, he'd know and be worried. "Scott.. What did it feel like when you.. When you changed?" I asked him. He looked confused but willing. "Do you want the truthful answer or the not so truthful answer?" He asked. "Truthful." I replied, quickly wishing I'd have said "Not so truthful." "It feels like every bone in your body, every muscle- is literally falling apart, like you're drowning within yourself. It's horrible. Why?" He shuddered, but still eyeing me carefully, but still grasping my hand and keeping his hand to my cheek. Prepare for the worst, I told myself. "What would you say to me.. To me changing?" His eyes stared into mine while he figured out what I was talking about. His eyes immediately widened. "No." He said. "Scott, we argue. All. The. Time. You always tell me 'I don't undersand', but if you change me, I could understand. I want this, Scott. Not just for you, but for me, too. For us. I've been thinking about it for ages an-" He cut me off "No. No! Allison, listen to yourself! What are you even saying?! Did you not hear me talking about how painful it is? Changing is literally the worst pain anyone could ever bear! I could never let you feel that. Never." "Scott, please! Just listen-" I tried, "No, I'm not gonna listen, because this isn't even a question! There is no way in hell you're changing!" I began to well up. "Scott, I-I don't know how much longer we'll last.. I'm scared.." I said, biting down sobs. "Not fair, Allison! I'm saying this because I care!" He shouted. He released my hand and moved away from me. He sat at the end of the bed, his head in his hands. I turned away from him and began to sob into the pillow. In arguments, Scott would never shout this much and I'd never usually get this hurt. I guess this was a touchy subject. After a few minutes, he crawled back under the covers and put his arms around me, holding me tightly. "I'm sorry. It's okay Allison, it's okay.." He whispered into my ear, rubbing my bare back. I turned to face him and burrows my head into his stomach. I hated crying, and I hated people seeing me cry. So I sobbed into his body as he held me and whispered soothing things into my ear.

"I love you. Okay? I love you.. Shh.." he whispered into my ear as I uttered my last sob and drifted into a deep sleep.

Goddamnit Allison, I thought to myself,

Why the hell do you always have to mess things up for?

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