Divergent: No War

Chapter 39

Because I'm nice, I'm publishing the rest of the story today. Enjoy!

I stand in front of his door. I want to knock, but I don't. But I want to.

I take a deep breath, then knock on the door. It opens instantly, as if Tobias was waiting for me.

"Tris." He tries to say sternly, but his voice cracks I bit.

"To- Four," I correct myself. "Wh- why did you think I didn't love you anymore?"

He thinks for a minute. "You were always doubting yourself, why wouldn't you just leave me? He was younger, and he showed his feelings more, and I guess I didn't thi-"

I stop him with a kiss. I wrap my arms around his neck, but he doesn't kiss back. He just pushes me away. I feel a deep ache in my chest. Is he rejecting me?

"Tris. I know you wouldn't have let him kiss you. You aren't like that."

"Have you ever thought to let me explain? You just assumed the worst, what about was really happened?" I ask, anger bubbling inside me.

"You didn't have to explain! I saw it, he was kissing you, and you let him!" He argues.

"I was backed up against a wall, he held me down, I couldn't move!" I say.

"You didn't resist!"

"You know what I was thinking that whole time? I was trying to calm myself, telling myself it would all be over soon. I was thinking like I would in a fear landscape and your voice was the one telling me to calm down."

Tears form at the edges of my eyes. He just stands there, so I turn and walk down the hall.

I walk into my apartment and sink to the floor, covering my face with my hands. I let out a groan of mixed emotions. I don't know what I'm thinking.

Christina comes from her room.

"Oh, Tris, I didn't know you were here." She says. "What's wrong?"

I stand up, and slide my hands down my pants to remove the sweat that's collected on my palms.

"I think Four and I broke up." I choke out, before collapsing into her, tears spilling out.

She embraces me into a hug, as I cry.

"That Jeremy has a lot a nerve to get in the way of you and Four." She says, angrily. She pulls away, looking at me. "Didn't you explain to Four what happened?"

"Yes, I just did, but he just stood there, so I walked off." I say.

I walking over to the couch and clutch a pillow.

"I just want him back." I mumble. "I miss him, even if its only been a couple of days."

Christina stays silent for a second. "Tris, just tell him that. If he really loves you, he should be able to forgive you." She sits down next to me. "Just between you and me, Shauna said that Four went to Zeke's late that night. She left, because Four was in shambles. Said she has never seen him like that. I haven't asked Zeke anything, and he probably wouldn't talk about it."

He does want me. He does, but then why won't he let me explain, talk to him, or even look at me? Was he jealous? He couldn't be, he'd seen me punch Jeremy, confirming I didn't have any feelings for him. But he also saved me from Eric making a move. Was that his protective instinct, or was it jealously?

I nod, showing Chris that I listened. She gets up, and tells me she's going to dinner.

~~~

The next day, Tobias still doesn't talk to me. All through the fights, he stayed silent, except for calling the winners, and wouldn't look my way.

That night, I end up walking around the halls, mindlessly, and I end up in front of Tobias' door.

I take a deep breath, and knock. The door opens after a moment, and Tobias stands there. He suddenly has an expression of hope, longing, and desperation, but its gone as soon as it came.

"What do you need?" He asks.

"I need to talk to you." I say, playing around with my wording in my mind, going with what Christina said to try.

I need to just tell him the truth.