The Gangleader's Pact {#Wattys2017}

5- Hey! WHO THE HELL ATE MY WEED BROWNIES?!

❝The more you weigh, the harder you are to kidnap. Stay safe. Eat cake.❞

🦄

I woke up feeling like death. Not even Nicholas' broken testicles could cheer me up. I trudged down the stairs in an attempt to find some food. After eating that sandwich yesterday, I was even hungrier than before.

What can I say? Food makes me hungry.

I got to the kitchen and went into the fridge. I found a pack of brownies and took them out. I started to eat them. They tasted a bit funny, but I didn't mind the taste. I ate 20 of them. Afterwards, I felt tired so I went back to bed.

2 hours later

Nicholas' POV

I hate that girl. I want to strangle her until she drops dead, but we need her. I need her. In order for me to get back at Carmine.

"Hello, my beautiful peasants. What breakfast will be served to your king this very morning?" Isaac stumbled into the kitchen and stretched his arms. I scowled.

"How's your ankle Issy." I called him by the nickname he hated.

"It is fine. Thank you very much, dragon." He then looked at me and smirked. "How are your balls Nico? Better hope that they don't fall off when they're inside of a-" Before he could finish I lunged after him, but not before wincing and holding my crotch.

Damn you Claire.

I was just about to run after Isaac when a loud rumble came from the staircase. We all looked at the doorway and in came Claire.

She looked awful.

"Hesho, peoples." She slurred out then dropped on the floor.

"Claire!" Isaac, of course, ran to help her.

"Daddy? Is that you?" She held his face. "I haven't seen you since I came out of mommy's va-jj." She then grinned.

"Hey! WHO THE HELL ATE MY WEED BROWNIES?!" Tim yelled. He slammed the fridge shut and looked at us. He caught sight of Claire and walked towards her. "DID YOU EAT THE ONE THING THAT MAKEs ME HAPPY?!"

"Yup! And they were gooooooood." Claire started to giggle and then out of no where, she screamed. "She then got up and ran towards the toaster.

"WE'RE LOSING THEM! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!" She grabbed the toaster and started shaking it. "WE'RE LOSING THEM! DON'T YOU DIE ON ME DAMNIT!"

She pointed at Isaac and then gave orders. "NURSE! WE NEED 12 CC'S OF CREAM CHEESE STAT!" Isaac being the dumb fool he was, happily obliged.

Idiots.

She started patting the toaster. She was going to break it. "If we don't restart his heart, we're toast."

"JESUS CRUST!" Tim yelled.

"JAM IT!" Seth hit his fist on the counter. Where the hell did he come from?

"He's bread Claire." Isaac patted her back and lowered his head.

Claire looked at her wrist which had nothing on it. "Time of deliciousness: 9:17 am." She looked at an imaginary person next to her. "Daddy's in a butter place now, kids." She sulked to the stool next to me.

"Okay," I clapped my hands together. "We need to come up with a game plan if we're gonna beat Carmine."

"Easy. We just kill his men, then his family then him." Derek shrugged his shoulders and went to sucking his lollipop.

"Um, any other suggestions?" I asked.

"OH! OH! ME!" Isaac raised his hands.

"Yes, Isaac?" I sighed.

"Maybe we can ask them nicely?" He smiled innocently even though he was far from it.

"If I killed you nicely, wouldn't you still be killed?" I glared at him before looking at everyone else. "Anyone else?"

"I have an idea." Claire piped up.

"Anyone else?" 

"Me?"

"Anyone? Seriously?" I looked at the delusional monkey. "Fine."

"Drink your school, stay in sleep, don't do milk and get eight hours of drugs." She grinned before leaning over the side, puking and passing out on my lap.

MY GOD DAMN BALLS?!

🦄

Sorry for the short chapter, but I was kind of rushing since I had to go somewhere. 

Hope you like...

Where are my unicorns?

🦄