Faith and Freedom

Chapter Twenty-Two

The wind blew through my hair as Redemption and I galloped across the field. I felt myself getting heavier with my emotions as she carried me across the open space. I didn't want her to go. She helped me with a lot more than I ever thought possible. She was my saving grace when I thought I was lost forever. I felt like I was losing everything now. I knew it was going to happen, I just didn't want to face the inevitable. The pressure in my chest knocked the wind out of me as a new wave of fresh tears coated my cheeks. The colors ran together with my blurred vision and how fast Red was running. I guess her new owner had a horse before her, born on the same day as her, and he had passed away. I hope she knows how lucky she is.... to have such an amazing horse and a new best friend... I'll miss her dearly, but I of all people understand loss. I would give anything to have a family of my own again, with a mom and a dad for Melody and I. I miss the feeling of being complete so much that it drives me crazy when I hear some of the kids saying how they would love to live here with Jackie because of how much more chill she is and because they feel that their parents are control freaks.

They don't see how lucky they are. At least they have parents. I had to step up and become a parent to my little sister because my parents were killed. Shot in the head right in front of my sister and I. But I don't tell them that. Instead I speak to the empty air when I'm alone, to Renegade when he is in his corral at two in the morning, but most of all to Redemption when I have no where else to turn. So this new girl needs to realize how lucky she is. How amazing her new horse is. I slow Red down and turn her around to walk back to the barn. I've made my peace with her leaving because I know she will help someone else the way she has helped me. And for me, that is reason enough for me to be happy for her, despite knowing how much I know I'm going to miss her.

When I return to the barn, a sleek black Dodge is in the driveway with a fancy looking trailer that says Orange Grove Stable and Horse Rescue on it. This must be it. I have to let her go now. I don't fight the tears that begin to silently well up and spill over down my face. But as I ride up at a slow ambling walk, Jackie comes up to meet me. She looks upset. Not mad, but.... Sorry for me. I lean down and hug Red while atop her broad back and she reaches around to nuzzle my knee. When she turns to look at Jackie, I slip off of her and go to pet her gorgeous face. But Jackie pulls me in a hug and before I know it, I'm sobbing like an infant on her shoulder. A blonde around my age comes into my blurry vision and gives me a look of concern. I straighten up and wipe my tears away so I can see her clearly.

"I'm sorry you didn't get to see her right away.... I needed time to say goodbye...." I say flatly.

"It's okay. I understand... I wanted to ask, after hearing you're the one assigned to Redemption in the first place, would you be interested in going on a trail ride with me? I brought a horse from my parents rescue so she would have company, but if you want to take her out on a ride I'll be happy to ride the horse I brought."

"Oh... Um... Sure. My name's Shasta by the way. Thanks for offering a ride even though I'm a stranger to you."

"Well, I figure you're here for a reason and I could really use a friend right now. Even if you just pretend to be my friend."

"Okay."

"I'm sorry, I must have lost my manners. My name is Cassidy."

"It's nice to meet you. Do you want to help me get her put up? We went for a long ride and I think she needs to rest."

"Sure."

With that we walked to the barn with Red in tow. Cassidy was quiet and so was I, neither of us daring to break the silence. I felt the beginning of the pain I knew I'd feel for weeks after Red would leave with this girl and I wanted the earth to swallow me, to make it go away. But I knew she was needed somewhere else. And not by me.

She helped me untack and brush down Red before I turned her out into the mares field to let her relax. When we were finished, Cassidy went to get the horse she brought, who I later learned was named Cheeto, while I got Renegade. Cheeto was a 15.2 hand Hanoverian, dark buckskin gelding. His coloring was what named him, as he looked almost orangeish in color. Renegade, however, looked almost like an oreo cookie. Almost. 

I grabbed his mint green western saddle blanket and his saddle and began tacking him up. He had calmed down considerably well for a wild animal and I was proud of the progress we had made together as I slipped the girth into place.

"So who's this?" Cassidy inquired, looking at Renegade with deep interest.

"This is Renegade. He is the horse I was actually assigned to... Red was only assigned to me until I trained him.." I say, my voice small.

"Wait, so he was just a pasture horse before that?"

"I guess you could call it that. He's a mustang." I reply, a little bit of pride welling up at the thought of how far he's come with me.

"He's gorgeous. I had the most wonderful horse... he was a gorgeous chestnut named Dewy." She says, sadness creeping in. "I lost him not too long ago...."

"Are you staying here at all?" I ask, feeling bad for her.

"For a few weeks. Just to make sure Redemption is right for me."

"Well, if you want to be friends, I could use one too." I say, a small smile forming.

"I'd like that." She says, smiling back.

Word count: 1091

Hey, I know it's been forever, but I have had very little time to write. I have a job and I've been busy with that and life just got in the way. I'm really sorry and I hope you understand. To whoever is left, thanks for being there. It means a lot.

~Kassie