Tidefall's Song

Part III | Cold-blooded Animal

"Please don't stand so close to me
I'm having trouble breathing.
I'm afraid of what you'll see, right now.
I'll give you everything I am,
All my broken heartbeats.
Until I know you'll understand.
And I will make sure to keep my distance,
Say I love you when you're not listening..."

-'Distance', Christina Perri & Jason Mraz.

•••

Let her go.

"And how exactly do you do that?" I asked, not meeting his eyes as I spoke.

How does one let go of someone who has been with you through thick and thin? Someone who has seen you at your worst and at your greatest?

I cautiously lifted my eyes and gazed into his warm eyes. He had a lazy smile on his face, giving away a playful demeanor. "Now that is something you'll have to figure out for yourself. The art of letting go works differently for different people," he replied.

Well, so much for helping.

"You're going to be fine, Elisa," he said. And for a moment, I really thought I could believe that.

"Thanks, Ivan," I said half-heartedly. He gave me a small smile.

"What happened to the "no-spilling-to-a-stranger" policy?" He jokingly asked, making me slap him on his shoulder as I laughed.

"Oh, shut it. Stranger or not, you've told me what I needed to hear for a change, and not just sympathising with me. So, thank you," I said. And this time, I meant it.

"Sympathy won't change anything, Elisa. Actually, scratch that - it does change something. You'll grow so tired of it that you get annoyed and decide to push yourself to move on," he said.

I was speechless for a moment. If there is something I could describe Ivan as, it would be the fact that he's wise as an owl. "Sympathy is annoying," I rephrased.

"Yeah. We should probably leave now. Thanks for the meal," he said before giving me a wide smile.

"You're welcome."

We bid each other our farewells, and went to our separate paths.

But not before exchanging our numbers with each other.

•••

I dreaded the beginning of the week. I didn't feel like going to school either. I felt lightheaded, but we all know the actual reason why I didn't want to go to school today.

Instead of staying in bed, I forced myself to wake up and I went into the bathroom. I could see the bags under my eyes and the haggard look I possessed now. It was horrible. But I shrugged it off, running my hands through my messy and freshly-out-of-bed mane before turning the shower on.

Forty-five minutes later, I found myself on the school ground with all my senses heightened up. With Maths being my first class, the desire to just run away grew stronger. Only that I didn't, and that I continued to act as if everything's fine.

I went up to the first block of my school to go to the teachers' office and retrieve my experimental reports book from my Biology teacher. Mrs. Bachumann smiled as she saw me approaching her, already knowing what I wanted prior to the text I sent her yesterday. "If only we had more student like you," she said, and I laughed. "Thank you."