Broken Promises

Chapter 24

When I woke up it took me a while to realise that I was home again. I sat up looking around my room. It hasn't really changed since I left but for some reason, I felt like a guest in it. On the bed, next to me was a note, from Nicole I assumed. 

Had to go home! Call me if you need me. xo

I placed it back on the bed and got up starting to get ready. I approach the long dark curtains and opened them revealing a beautiful scenery. There were snowflakes fluttering from the sky. It was almost dark but not quite yet. I realised I've slept through most of the day. The trees that stood tall guarding the house, were slightly frosted as if with sugar. I stood there gazing out in awe. I placed a hand on the window and felt the coldness against my skin. My breathing fogged up the glass and so I drew a heart.

Quickly, I got dressed and ran down the stairs, to find the house was empty. I remembered my parents telling me they had to work overnight today. Everything was going according to plan. I put on my favourite ankle boots and draped a scarf around my neck. Pushing the door open I ran outside feeling much better all of a sudden. I ran a bit further from the house and I reached out opening my palm to catch the snowflakes. Looking up, it seemed almost as if the snowflakes were swirling around me in a perfect circle. Spinning, I danced around with them. I was happy. If this was meant to be my last day I'd die happy. But there were just a few more things I needed to do in order for me to be truly happy. I reached for my phone and called Lauren while running towards my mum's car. 

She answered almost immediately. "Hi, Cassie. Are you home yet?" She asked with a hint of anticipation in her voice.

"Yes. I'm coming over," I stated so matter of factly. 

Her voice immediately sounded a bit more cheerful. "Thank you. I'll be waiting," she replied. 

"See you soon," I smiled. Not wasting any time, I got into the car and put the key into the ignition. And soon I was on my way. The roads were glazed with ice, the headlights causing them to glisten beautifully. I was following the sparkly road that weaved through the green of the swaying trees as the snowflakes kept fluttering ahead. I was being careful, driving slowly, however it was still quite difficult to keep the car going in a straight line. I put on the radio and sang along to the songs that came on. The song We Are Young  by fun came on immediately I chuckled as I remembered singing this song with everyone. It was only yesterday but yesterday already seemed so far away. It was only a memory now. A beautiful memory.

In a matter of minutes, I was turning into Lauren's street. Blake's street. I've been there many times and it seemed as if nothing had changed.In the distance, I could see Lauren's car sitting outside the house. I slowed down, approaching carefully. 

Their house. The same house I've visited so many times. The house I loved because somehow it always made me feel safe. Would it feel different being there now? On the outside, it was the same. The same brick walls. The same big windows. The same door. Even the swing on the porch was same. The swing that we spent so much time on, having endless conversations with Blake. 

I parked across the road and sat there for a while, waiting for the song to end. Taking deep breaths I stared at the house, trying to prepare myself for whatever awaited me inside. The snow was still making its way down, heavily. 

I took another deep breath and stepped out of the car, careful not to slip on the icy road. Step by step, I was getting closer. It seemed as if all the lights were on. Soon enough, I was face to face with the door. I felt a huge lump in my throat as I rang the doorbell. The door opened and there she was. Lauren was standing in front of me in a grey sweater and jeans. Her hair was a mess but it still managed to look good. Her face, however, was almost unrecognisable. It was the face of a girl crying out for help. She looked so fragile and hurt. 

"Hi." She greeted me with a sad smile. "You're wearing the necklace," she stated looking down at the pendant she left me in the hospital. The truth was that even after finding out what Blake had done, I couldn't bear the thought of taking it off. It was a part of me now. 

I nodded. "Hi," I smiled back at her but I couldn't hide the worry in my expression. Without another word, I pulled her into a hug. I could hear her sigh as if she hasn't been hugged in a long while. I felt her pain as she hugged me back. I could feel her slow heartbeat against my chest. 

"Come in," she invited me after letting go, closing the door behind us. I observed the place trying to find the similarities and the differences. Somehow, the place seemed duller. It always used to be so bright and colourful. So happy. But now it was dark even with the lights on and it was as if the colours have faded. "Want something to drink or eat?" she offered. 

"No thank you," I declined. Even the sweet scent was gone, now it was more bitter. The furniture hasn't moved an inch. It was the same place and yet it was so different at the same time. It lost that feeling of home. "How are your parents?" I asked. 

"Still the same, I guess." she shrugged, looking over at me hopelessly. 

"Cassie?" A familiar voice sent chills down my whole body. I took a deep breath as I turned around and there she was just as I expected. Blake's mum. She was even more different now than at the funeral. She seemed like she aged by at least 10 years. Her eyes were dark, gazing at me surprised.  She was holding an old, rugged blanket around her and her hair was also a mess just like Lauren's but it didn't suit her at all. She was such a graceful and elegant woman and now this was what was left of her. 

I smiled a little. "Mrs Bailey." For a moment it seemed as if she froze. And along with her, it seemed as if time froze too. 

She approached me carefully as if I was a ghost, only a vision. And as soon as she was close enough, she placed a hand on my shoulder carefully as if to check if I were real. I felt my eyes starting to fill up with tears and hers did the same as she hugged me weakly. 

I didn't say a word. There wasn't a word to say anyway. 

After a few seconds, she gently pulled away but she almost lost her balance and so I put an arm around her and guided her to a nearby chair. "Thank you for coming." She smiled sadly. "Blake would  be glad to see you." 

"Blake's not here anymore, mum!" Lauren added, frustratedly but her mum acted like she didn't hear her and she didn't look away from me. It was like she was still taking this all in. 

"Blake would want you to try and continue your life," I said empathetically as I reached over to squeeze her fragile, porcelain hand. "He would want that for all of us."

She finally looked away from me. "I miss my son." 

Her words were almost unbearable to listen to. I nodded, "I know. We all do." I paused trying to find the right words. "But he'll always be with us as long as we keep his memory alive. It's okay to cry and want him back but at the same time, we need to be there for each other and help each other through this. We need to get our lives back. And so do you. You guys are one of the best families I have ever seen. You need to stick together and let this tragedy bring you closer and make you stronger. We need to live for the people that are still here. We need to live for ourselves and we need to live for Blake because I know that he can see us. And I know he feels guilty for bringing down so many people. You need to be strong for your daughter, your husband and your son."

Raising her head carefully, she stared into my eyes again and nodded, "You're a great girl, Cassie. I was so happy the day when Blake brought you home." She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "You are so beautiful. Not only on the outside but on the inside too. You're a beautiful person." She gave me a sweet smile, it was closer to the smile I remembered. Soon the smile faded and she turned towards Lauren. "I'm so sorry," she whispered. "I'm sorry Lauren. I'm sorry I wasn't there." she sobbed as Lauren walked over to her. "I just couldn't." 

"I know," she nodded, her voice so broken and vulnerable. She pulled her mother into a hug and they both sat there crying as Mrs Bailey kept apologising.

I smiled through my tears as a voice behind me whispered, "Thank you." 

I looked down on the ground, smiling. "Of course," I whispered.