Iron heart

fifteen

Well this was crazy.
So basically what went down is we've been down here a year. A whole year. Stuck in this damn cave. So on the anniversary of when we started the calendar. Sort of.
Well not sort of but.

Isabella lost it. She had been cool and calm if not a little depressed at times, never actually taking the time to get the other feelings about this whole ordeal out of her emotional system. I had yelled and stomped my feet enough that I didn't have what she had. And she lost it.
She threw things everywhere, screamed and cursed.
Honestly cursed, I didn't know where she learned all those expletives because I'd been careful because Isabella is a saint, but damn she could say the most filthy things. Pots and pans, soap bottles, packets of oatmeal and instant mash potatoes went flying. Scribbled how much she hated it in here on the wall, kicking the walls which I made her stop in fear of her hurting herself and then she just went back to throwing things.
I'd also learned things, like the names in the devils family. Alice, Jasper, Rosalie, Emmett, Carlisle, and Esme. All mentioned and given quite a few curses, not to mention lucifer himself Edward. About how Alice couldn't tell her what to wear anymore, or how to be ladylike. How Rosalie shouldn't have even bothered disliking her if they were all going to leave her. That Emmett could stop with all his god awful jokes and move on with his life. Carlise, who'd saved her life a few times, mentioned to not have because her life ended when they left. Esme and Jasper were left alone, and I have no idea why.

Edward was followed with plenty of suggestions to have sex with himself.

She tore out everything she didn't like in the garden which ended up being about half of it. Then, finally, she broke down crying. Curled up into a small ball of tears that I carefully picked up, and gently rocked. She shook with all the sobs going through her, and I had no idea what to do about any of it. Isabella cried at feeling inadequate for me, that she somehow wasn't enough. Saying that I would end up realizing what a mess she was and leave her for some girl who knew what she was doing. I was crying by then too.

Because we were in a cave, and she had so much wallowed up pain inside her. I told her that I would never find a more amazing or beautiful person to love in this world. Then I had to reassure her so many times I lost count that I loved her, and would never leave her to fend for herself.
I was going to burn the Cullen's, and after getting her father and Angela Webber put (Isabella's friend) outside on vacation. I was torching that town down to pieces.

Or at least visiting a few people and saying some very choice words to them. Very choice words.

Here's the craziest thing though. That wasn't the craziest thing.
A few hours, a meal, and a nap later even though she wasn't feeling as bad anymore there was still plenty of emotion.
Grabbing a small knife Loki had gotten us she headed to the wall with the first calendar from exactly a year ago on it. I would be concerned if it weren't for the fact that all this objects he had brought us were charmed so they couldn't cause us any harm.
With a quick murmur saying she was sacrificing the knife, she took the top of the blade to the stone and began carving it in.
And she didn't stop.

For three months.

We of course fixed up the cave from when she had lost it, she continued gardening, I kept fixing and making stuff, Loki kept up his visits. But for Isabella there was no more staring into oblivion, not as much at least. Now while I tinkered, she went to the wall with her knife and kept carving.
Her birthday passed, October and Halloween passed, then ironically the day before thanksgiving she finally found what she was looking for.
It was small, no bigger than her palm but it was a symbol. And a weird one at that. A rose with flames for petals, crystals for leaves, and a sun thing in the middle, with a ring around it in words in what looked like to be some sort of language that I didn't know.
It wasn't much but it was more than we had for the past year.