Fleur

Chapter Six

TRIGGER WARNINGS

•

Evan hung up the phone, ending the phone call with his mother. He'd have to take the subway to Dr. Sherman's office, something he wasn't too fond of. The subway was crowded and filled with people who were trying to sell things. The last time he'd taken a subway was when his father had taken him to Central Park to watch the snow fall from the frosted window of a café the night before he left forever. The subway was relatively close to school, a block away at most, and the instructions his mother left him were simple, It shouldn't be too complicated to get to his shrink's office. Clutching the straps of his backpack with one hand and the rail of the stairway with another, he made his way down the bustling stairs to the platform of the subway that would take him to his destination. While waiting for the train to arrive, he though about what he'd say to Dr. Sherman.

Today some kid, Connor Murphy, pushed me down in the hallway. But that's okay because he probably has some troubles at home. Then Jared stuck up for me and OH MY GOSH IS THAT KID GOING TO JUMP?

Evan shook his eyes and focused on the person standing on the edge of the platform. He looked like he was about to jump. Evan knew he couldn't just sit and watch, he had to do something. But what would he do? The cops wouldn't get there in time and every second he spent thinking of ways to save him, the boy looked closer and closer to jumping. With one foot off the edge, the boy took a deep breath and took a note out of his pocket. Acting on pure impulse, Evan dropped his backpack and ran as fast as he could to the boy. Just as he was about to walk off the edge, Evan threw out his arm, embracing the boy in a restrictive hug and pulling him away from the platform. The boy fought back, elbowing Evan and kicking the air in a desperate attempt to get away from Evan.

"Everything will be alright," Evan whispered to the boy as he stroked his hair. The boy looked at Evan as he struggled to get away. Once seeing his face, Evan immediately recognized the boy.

"Connor?"

"Let me go, Evan." Evan shook his head and tightened his grip around Connor's elbows. "Goddamnit, Evan! Please just let me go!" Evan shook his head again, determined to keep Connor from killing himself.

Connor couldn't take it any longer. Using all his strength, he broke free of Evan's grip and elbowed him in his nose, causing Evan's nose to start bleeding wildly. Taking advantage of Evan's grip loosening, Connor ran to the edge of the platform. The train was coming in a few minutes. All he'd have to do is wait, if he didn't get immediately electrocuted by the Third Rail. That's when he felt a sweaty hand clasp around his wrist.

"No. I'm not gonna let you jump, Connor."

Connor struggled against Evan's strong grip. Then he heard Evan gasp.

"Connor look at me."

Connor turned around slowly to face Evan.

"Your nose, Connor your nose!" Evan said with wide eyes.

"What about it?"

"F-flower."

•

Connor could swear he saw his life flash before his eyes. Of course. It all added up now. The cast, the spiking anxiety. Which meant everything he'd done, everything, had affected this innocent, beautiful, boy who didn't deserve any of it. The thought sickened him, a feeling of dread and remorse swirling in his stomach. Now more than ever he wanted to end it all. When Connor put his mind to something, he did not quit. No matter what. If in the process of killing himself Evan died, then so be it.

But Evan wouldn't let him. He hooked his arms around Connor's limp torso, grounding him to the dirty, concrete floor of the subway station. The truth was, Evan was a comfortable pillow at the moment and it wasn't like Evan would allow him to die anytime soon. Breaking his strong-character facade, Connor allowed his fears turn to tears as he sobbed into Evan's lap. Evan Caressed his head with the pads of his thumb.

"Your hair smells like vanilla," Evan commented while leaning into his head, sniffing his scalp. The act made Connor a bit uncomfortable, but he didn't dare tell him.

"Uh thanks?"

Evan nodded and hugged Connor.

"Everything is gonna be alright, okay buddy?"

Connor wondered if this is what a good father did to his son.

There they sat, the two freaks who were supposed to love each other alone in their own world on the floor of a crowded subway platform. Busied men and women and people who's genders were none of the above walked around them in a busy manner. Nobody had noticed the almost-suicide.

Connor closed his eyes and came to the conclusion that he'd just have to carry out his plan another day.