Broken Inside | Ash x Reader

My Life

"Bullied."

Scratches, bruises, tears, sadness.
If you were to look at me, that's what you'll see.

Everyday.

My classmates, my teacher, even my mom, they all bully and abuse me for not having any friends.

But how will I be able to make friends, if everyone hates me?

"Laughed at."

Sometimes, I wanna die, but when I try to attempt suicide, I never do it, cause I'm scared. I'm scared to die. But if I don't die, I'll have to suffer.

"Get lied at."

When I was 6, I actually made a friend. Her name was Katie, she was really nice and when someone tries to bully me, she stops them. When I'm around her, I always feel safe, and I feel like I can do anything. We'll always be there for each other, we even made a BFF necklace, which was my most valuable possession. Everyone eventually stopped bullying me and I was really happy.

I made more and more friends everyday and for the first time on my life, I was actually happy. They actually cared for me, they were actually my friends.

But I was wrong. I was wrong this entire time.

They all betrayed me and I learned that they were acting this entire time. At first, I thought it was a prank, but it was real. They really were just acting, they were just pretending to be my friend all this time, including Katie.

If that's not enough, they burned my necklace, my BFF necklace, my most valuable possession,

In front of me.

I locked myself in my room for days, crying, everyday.

I thought that I finally made friends, I thought I finally have someone to love and care for me. But I was wrong.

It was too good to be true anyways.

"Abused."

After school, everyday, I get abused by my mother. My own mother. She was actually nice to me, but when my father died in an accident, she just went insane. She started to blame me for his death, hurt me, even tried to stab me.

When she's drunk, it's even worse. One time, she nearly drowned me, and also tried to bury me alive. I don't even know why I'm still alive right now.

Maybe it's because the world still wants me to suffer.

Haven't I had enough?

Bullied, get lied at, abused, laughed at, isn't that enough?

Do you still want my to suffer?

Why?

Why world, why?

What have I ever done to you?

"Everyday, that's what I go through."

Why have I done to you, world? What?

Tell me, please tell me.

So I can fix it.

But why, why don't you ever tell me what I did?

How am I supposed to fix the mistake I've done if you don't tell me? How?

Please, just tell me already.

"Welcome,"

Please.

Please tell me.

I beg of you.

Tell me,

Please.

"To,"

How am I supposed to fix the mistake I did if you won't tell me, world? How?

Tell me, please.

Tell me what I've done,

So I can fix it.

And so I can make my own world more happy.

"My life."